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"A bad liver is to a Frenchman what a nervous breakdown is to an American. Everyone has had one and everyone wants to talk about it."
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"Exercise feels best after it is finished."

"It has been known for many years that a subset of the population cannot tolerate the radiation emitted by transmitting utility meters and sickness results in these people."

"Health and happiness are interconnected."

"Bitterness is the cancer of bones."

"Living in filth is dark doom. The light of awaken leads to cleanliness."

"An over-indulgence of anything, even something as pure as water, can intoxicate."
Explore more quotes by Art Buchwald

"A bad liver is to a Frenchman what a nervous breakdown is to an American. Everyone has had one and everyone wants to talk about it."

"This is a wonderful way to celebrate an 80th birthday... I wanted to be 65 again, but they wouldn't let me - Homeland Security."

"You can't make up anything anymore. The world itself is a satire. All you're doing is recording it."

"So far things are going my way. I am known in the hospice as The Man Who Wouldn't Die. I don't know if this is true or not, but I think some people, not many, are starting to wonder why I'm still around."

"If you attack the establishment long enough and hard enough, they will make you a member of it."
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