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Rainbow Rowell

"If Levi were a dog, he'd be a golden retriever. If he were a game, he'd be a Ping-Pong, incessant and bouncing and light."

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"If Levi were a dog, he'd be a golden retriever. If he were a game, he'd be a Ping-Pong, incessant and bouncing and light."

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Amber Hurdle

"Ma'am,' Augustus said, nodding toward her, 'your daughter's car has just been deservedly egged by a blind man. Please close the door and go back inside or we'll be forced to call the police.' After wavering for a moment, Monica's mom closed the door and disappeared."

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Amber Hurdle

"I liked that he was a tenured professor in the Department of Slightly Crooked Smiles with a dual appointments in the Department of Having a Voice that Made My Skin Feel More Like Skin."

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Amber Hurdle

"What is it with you today? says Christina on the way to breakfast. Her eyes are stillswollen from sleep and her tangled hair forms a fuzzy halo around her face."Oh, you know, I say. "Sun shining. Birds chirping.She raises an eyebrow at me, as if reminding me that we are in an undergroundtunnel."

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Amber Hurdle

"O, that he were here to write me down an ass! But, masters, remember, that I am an ass; though it be not written down, yet forget not that I am an ass."

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Amber Hurdle

"In a way, a lot of my humor comes from presenting things that are dramatic or shocking and then people not having socially appropriate responses, having people denying the drama by failing to react to it, and that's a really classic form of humor."

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Amber Hurdle

"Sergeant Colon of the Ankh-Morpork City Guard was on duty. He was guarding the Brass Bridge, the main link between Ankh and Morpork. From theft.When it came to crime prevention, Sergeant Colon found it safest to think big."

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Amber Hurdle

"I just don't- Ronan. My ears are bleeding!"Ronan turned down the music."

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Amber Hurdle

"Ben, if you get pee in my brand-new car, I am going to cut your balls off."Still peeing, Ben looks over at me smirking. "You re gonna need a hell of a big knife, bro."

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Amber Hurdle

"It's rude to stare, but the great thing about staring at a sedated person is that they don't know you're doing it."

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Amber Hurdle

"Well, while you were in the bathroom, I sat down at this picnic table here in Bumblefug, Kentucky, and noticed that someone had carved that GOD HATES FAG, which, aside from being a grammatical nightmare, is absolutely ridiculous. So I'm changing it to 'God Hates Baguettes.' It's tough to disagree with that. Everybody hates baguettes."

Explore more quotes by Rainbow Rowell

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Rainbow Rowell
"Every woman wants a man who'll fall in love with her soul as well as her body."
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Rainbow Rowell
"The first time he'd held her hand, it felt so good that it crowded out all the bad things. It felt better than anything had ever hurt."
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Rainbow Rowell
"Baz arched an elegant brow. "Are you going to snog the Humdrum-is that your plan? Because he's eleven. And he looks just like you. That's both vain and deviant, Snow, even for you."
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Rainbow Rowell
"You looked like the girl I loved."
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Rainbow Rowell
"He was probably being so quiet because he was trying not to say it out loud."
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Rainbow Rowell
"He smiles, and he's made of trouble. We should have dropped him in the Thames in a bag of stones. We should have left him out for the fairies."
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Rainbow Rowell
"No", she said, "I know that you don't like me.""You don't know anything."
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Rainbow Rowell
"October, baptize me with leaves! Swaddle me in corduroy and nurse me with split pea soup. October, tuck tiny candy bars in my pockets and carve my smile into a thousand pumpkins. O autumn! O teakettle! O grace!"
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Rainbow Rowell
"It made her want to have his babies and give him both her kidneys."
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Rainbow Rowell
"She was tired of being the one who cried."
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