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"I'm always ready to talk, shouldn't be a woman if I were not,' laughed Mrs. Jo."
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"Sometimes absurd logic can be amusing and heart-touching."
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Personal Development

"Alimony: the cash surrender value of a husband."
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Personal Development

"Beware of giggle grins, they are highly contagious."
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Personal Development

"When I reprimanded my son for hair like Michael Jackson he said: "I don't see the problem you wear yours like Michael Jordan.""
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Personal Development

"God, you had enough time to have been through it three times. You've been through my stuff. I bet you over and let one of you stick the world's longest finger up my ass. If a prostate check is an exam, that was a motherfucking safari. I was scared to look down. I thought I'd see that guy's finger nail sticking out of my cock."
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Personal Development

"God alert!" Blackjack yelled. "It's the wine dude!Mr. D sighed in exasperation. "The next person, or horse, who calls me the 'wine dude' will end up in a bottle of Merlot!"
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Personal Development

"Probably went swimming and got eaten by a pineapple."
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Personal Development

"Monkeys who very sensibly refrain from speech, lest they should be set to earn their livings."
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Personal Development

"Igor?' said Moist. 'You have an Igor?'Oh, yes,' said Hubert. 'That's how I get this wonderful light. They know the secret of storing lightning in jars! But don't let that worry you, Mr Lipspick. Just because I'm employing an Igor and working in a cellar doesn't mean I'm some sort of madman, ha ha ha!'Ha ha,' agreed Moist.Ha hah hah!,' said Hubert. 'Hahahahahaha!! Ahahahahahahhhhh!!!!!-'Bent slapped him on the back. Hubert coughed.Sorry about that, it's the air down here,' he mumbled."
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Personal Development

"This was beyond a joke. This had moved beyond foolishness, slipped over the line into genuine 24 karat Jesus-Christ-I-fucked-up-bigtime territory."
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Personal Development
Explore more quotes by Louisa May Alcott

"Housekeeping ain't no joke."
Responsibility

"A little kingdom I possess, where thoughts and feelings dwell; And very hard the task I find of governing it well."
Emotional

"We all have our own life to pursue, our own kind of dream to be weaving, and we all have the power to make wishes come true, as long as we keep believing."
Life

"It takes two flints to make a fire."
Fire

"Girls are so queer you never know what they mean. They say No when they mean Yes, and drive a man out of his wits for the fun of it."
Fun

"Conceit spoils the finest genius. There is not much danger that real talent or goodness will be overlooked long; even if it is, the consciousness of possessing and using it well should satisfy one, and the great charm of all power is modesty."
Power

"Far away there in the sunshine are my highest aspirations. I may not reach them, but I can look up and see their beauty, believe in them, and try to follow where they lead."
Beauty

"Have regular hours for work and play; make each day both useful and pleasant, and prove that you understand the worth of time by employing it well. Then youth will be delightful, old age will bring few regrets, and life will become a beautiful success."
Life

"Work is and always has been my salvation and I thank the Lord for it."
Work

"Good books, like good friends, are few and chosen; the more select, the more enjoyable."
Friendship
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