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"An original thought would crack your feeble skull like a thunderbolt, you craven vulture."
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"And if you say that's because you lot barged into her home like a herd of mentally deficient sheep, I'm disowning all three of you."
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Personal Development
"An injury is much sooner forgotten than an insult."
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Personal Development
"Oppression is more easily endured than insult."
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Personal Development
"I'd love to go out with you, but I'd hate to deprive some village of its idiot."
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Personal Development
"Each of us carries within himself a collection of instant insults."
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Personal Development
"You're going to burn in a very special level of hell. A level they reserve for child molesters and people who talk at the theater."
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Personal Development
"Never insult an alligator until after you have crossed the river."
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Personal Development
"Adding "just kidding" doesn't make it okay to insult the Principal."
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Personal Development
"For how long will insult hurt a person? For as long as he covets self-importance. For as long as one covets temporary [non eternal] things."
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Personal Development
"Girls like you want to cut guy's nuts off and hang 'em from your rearview mirror."
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"There's a fine edge to new grief, it severs nerves, disconnects reality--there's mercy in a sharp blade. Only with time, as the edge wears, does the real ache begin."
Grief
"I've won Satan's lottery."
Religion
"Stephenie Meyer: Her vampires are sparkly, which I think we can all agree is wrong."
Critique
"One day I was telling him that I thought that cars had replaced guns as phallic symbols for American men, and I thought it was interesting that he had one that was so small and fast. The next day he gave me the Datsun and went out and bought a Lincoln."
Masculinity
"We were seekers. You are that which is sought, Joshua. You are the source. The end is divinity, in the beginning is the word. You are the word."
Spiritual
"And I'll have you know that if you hurt my son again, if he so much as sighs sadly over his coffee, I will hire a man, a Russian, probably, to hunt you down and rip all that shiny black hair from your head, then break your skinny arms and legs, and set you on fire, and then put you out with a hammer. And should there be children from your beastly rutting, I shall have the Russian man cut them to tiny pieces and feed them to Madame Jacob's dog. because, although he may be only a worthless, simpleminded, libertine artist, Lucien is my favorite, and I will not have him hurt. Do you understand?"
Protection
"The prospect of change is a many-fanged beast, my dear."
Growth
"Lash had been explaining to her that it's impolite to refer to an African American as a nigga, unless one was another African American, when Troy Lee came in and said, 'She only speaks Cantonese.''She does not. She keeps coming in and saying 'What's up my nigga?'''Oh yeah. She does that to me, too. Did you give her a pound?''No. I didn't give her a pound, motherfucker. She called me a nigga.''Well, she's not going to quit unless you give her a pound. It's just the way she rolls.''That's some bullshit, Troy.''It's her couch."
Culture
"It's sarcasm, Josh.'Sarcasm?'It's from the Greek, sarkasmos. To bite the lips. It means that you aren't really saying what you mean, but people will get your point. I invented it, Bartholomew named it.'Well, if the village idiot named it, I'm sure it's a good thing.'There you go, you got it.'Got what?'Sarcasm.'No, I meant it.'Sure you did.'Is that sarcasm?'Irony, I think.'What's the difference?'I haven't the slightest idea.'So you're being ironic now, right?'No, I really don't know.'Maybe you should ask the idiot.'Now you've got it.'What?'Sarcasm."
Art
"It was the sound of a thousand hungry children crying, ten thousand widows tearing their hair over their husband's graves, a chorus of angels singing the last dirge on the day of God's death."
Suffering
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