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"Have a chocolate-covered raisin, he said."They look like rat droppings, said the Chair.The Dean peered at them in the gloom."So that's it, he said. "The bag fell on the floor a minute ago, and I thought there seemed rather a lot."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Why do we laugh at such terrible things? Because comedy is often the sarcastic realization of inescapable tragedy."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I wear so many disguises on the show that only a real comedy fan might spot me."
Author Name
Personal Development
"One of my biggest problems with comedy was that I did not understand some of the jokes."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I hate comedy... Yo...-yo bitch."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Now, if you have never been hit by a flying burrito, count yourself lucky. In terms of deadly projectiles, it's right up there with grenades and cannonballs."
Author Name
Personal Development
"98% of all comedians feel obliged to be funny when interviewed. Less than 2% succeed."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Comedy to me has always seemed a social tightrope for the comedian. For all axioms intellectually sound the general public would prefer to be amused, but in those emotionally sound, it then chooses to get offended."
Author Name
Personal Development
"You need to understand that some comedy can have consequences."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I never watch comedies they suck if something sucks it sucks there isn't doubt about it."
Author Name
Personal Development
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"It's important to have the right agent - people that are working hard for you. But an actor needs to be in control of their career no matter how good the representation is."
People
"Yes, I would say my comedy is grunge, evidenced by the fact my jokes have put an end to big-hair glam comedy."
Comedy
"In prison, inmates sometimes use Cheetos and grape juice as makeup. I wouldn't use that beauty regimen around Britney Spears - she might lick your face off!"
Beauty
"I don't think the NFL had the slightest intention of taking me, except as maybe a water boy."
Intention
"Follow what your head is telling you and work hard. That's the big secret."
Work
"Joel McHale is so money, he should be printed on money."
Money
"Once you've been booked, people in Hollywood say, 'Oh he must be good.' All the while you're the same actor."
People
"My goal and my career is definitely not to be famous. That's a really horrible goal, just to be famous for the sake of having fame."
Goal
"If you have a dream, just lie about it. Lie your way unto your dreams."
Dream
"You have to have talent. You have to get the audition and then you have to nail the audition."
Talent
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