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"Even when people are rich and successful on TV shows, there's always some trouble - you have to poke holes in them, throw them out of a job, put a pie in the face."
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"The last resort of kings, the cannonball. The last resort of the people, the paving stone."

"It is not true that people are naturally equal for no two people can be together for even a half an hour without one acquiring an evident superiority over the other."

"There are bad people who would be less dangerous if they were quite devoid of goodness."

"There are only two kinds of people who are really fascinating - people who know absolutely everything, and people who know absolutely nothing."

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"Like I said, all comedy is based on exaggeration, big or small, whatever you can get away with."

"As far as your personal goals are and what you actually want to do with your life, it should never have to do with the government. You should never depend on the government for your retirement, your financial security, for anything."

"When I did Comic Relief, I did it to be on the show; it's a badge of honor as a comedian to do that show."

"Even when people are rich and successful on TV shows, there's always some trouble - you have to poke holes in them, throw them out of a job, put a pie in the face."
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