top of page
.png){kind=small}
"And I was all, 'Don't be gross, you crustacious fuck. You pull that thing out and I'll pepper-spray you until you fry.' (You have to be stern with weenie waggers--I've been exposed to on the bus over seventeen times, so I know.)"
Standard
Customized
Exlpore more Provocation quotes
"She began stroking my ankles. I considered kicking her in the cunt."
"The youth of Idaho falls should be encouraged to take drugs in order to cope up with the fact that there is plutonium in their drinking water."
"I am provocative, and I admit this. It isn't as if I'm only on the receiving end, a poor, frail little creature. I can be thoroughly nasty when I get going, and I don't pull my punches."
"If you thought with your minds and not your roosters, you would get the point!"
"And maybe it was fair; if a book was any good, it was a slap in the face to someone."
"They look at someone like me, and I just really get up their nose. I really wind them up."
"He was going to take a dive into this lake. He just didn't know it. Cerise rose, finding footing in the soft mud. The water came up to just below her breasts and her wet shirt stuck to her body. William's gaze snagged on her chest. Yep, keep looking, Lord Bill. Keeeeeep looking."
"In fact, in recent years I have become more and more didactic about pubic hair - to the point where I now believe that there are only four things a grown, modern woman should have: a pair of yellow shoes (they unexpectedly go with everything), a friend who will come and post bail at 4 a.m., a fail-safe pie recipe, and a proper muff. A big, hairy minge. A lovely furry moof that looks - when she sits, naked - as if she has a marmoset sitting in her lap. A tame marmoset, that she can send of to pickpocket things, should she so need it - like that trained monkey in Raiders of the Lost Ark."
"I'm not a parent myself, but I think the best solution at this point is to slap that child across the face. It won't stop crying, but at least now it'll be doing it for a good reason."
Explore more quotes by Christopher Moore
"I tried cutting myself to express my heartbreak over Tommy (Lord Flood) rejecting me, but OMFG it hurts like flaming fuck."
"But Charlie could imagine, because he was a Beta Male, and imagination was his curse...."
"Rivera rubbed his temples. 'Satan told you to do it?' he said wearily.'No.''Elvis?''I told you, it's supernatural."
"She was an alien, really - a sort of eating, pooping, tantrum machine - and he didn't understand anything about her species."
"You cannot believe what you do not believe, Rumi siad. I am an Untouchable because my karma dictates it."
"I'm feeling full of tiny princes, bustling to get out into the world and start plotting against one another."
"Mr. Asher, you can resist who you are for only so long. Finally, you just decide to go with fate."
bottom of page