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Benny Hill

"I thought I couldn't afford to take her out and smoke as well. So I gave up cigarettes. Then I took her out and one day I looked at her and thought: "Oh well," and I went back to smoking again, and that was better."

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"I thought I couldn't afford to take her out and smoke as well. So I gave up cigarettes. Then I took her out and one day I looked at her and thought: "Oh well," and I went back to smoking again, and that was better."

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"I took thought, and invented what I conceived to be the appropriate title of 'agnostic'."

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"I thought it completely absurd to mention my name in the same breath as the presidency."

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"In Socrates' thought the two marks of individual self-consciousness appear; it is practical and it is social."

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Asa Don Brown

"I'm often asked what I think about as I run. Usually the people who ask this have never run long distances themselves. I always ponder the question. What exactly do I think about when I'm running? I don't have a clue."

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Benny Hill
"Girls are like pianos. When they're not upright, they're grand."
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"That's what show business is, sincere insincerity."
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"The odds against there being a bomb on a plane are a million to one, and against two bombs a million times a million to one. Next time you fly, cut the odds and take a bomb."
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"I'm not against half naked girls - not as often as I'd like to be."
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Benny Hill
"I thought I couldn't afford to take her out and smoke as well. So I gave up cigarettes. Then I took her out and one day I looked at her and thought: "Oh well," and I went back to smoking again, and that was better."
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