"If life gives you lemons, make some kind of fruity juice."

Life, Lemons

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"If life gives you lemons, make some kind of fruity juice."

Explore more quotes by Conan O'Brien

"Scientists announced that they have located the gene for alcoholism. Scientists say they found it at a party, talking way too loudly."

Party, Scientists, Talking

"Michael Jackson was inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. It caused quite a controversy, because his nose isn't eligible for another fifteen years."

Controversy, Fame, Years

"Starbucks says they are going to start putting religious quotes on cups. The very first one will say, 'Jesus! This cup is expensive!'"

First, Quotes, Religious, Will

"Tom Cruise's attorney said he is going to sue anyone who claims he is gay. In a related story, Ricky Martin's attorney has been hospitalized for exhaustion."

Exhaustion, Gay, Martin

"If life gives you lemons, make some kind of fruity juice."

Life, Lemons

"This Halloween, the most popular mask is the Arnold Schwarzenegger mask. And the best part? With a mouth full of candy you will sound just like him."

Popular, Sound, Will

"In a prime-time address, President Bush said he backed limited federal funding for stem cell research. That's right, the President said, this is a quote, the research could help cure brain diseases like Alzheimer's, Parkinson's, and whatever it is I have."

Cure, Help, President, Research

"Apparently Arnold was inspired by President Bush, who proved you can be a successful politician in this country even if English is your second language."

Success, Successful, Country, English, Language

"A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal skills than men. I just want to say to the authors of that study: 'Duh.'"

Woman, Women, Post, Study, Want

"During last night's debate, John Kerry and John Edwards were so friendly to each other some political experts think that they may end up running together. In fact Kerry and Edwards were so friendly, President Bush accused them of planning a gay marriage."

Marriage, Debate, End, Experts

Exlpore more Life quotes

"Will a loving God send a man to hell? The answer from Jesus and His teachings of the Bible is, clearly, “Yes!” He does not send man willingly, but man condemns himself to eternal hell because . . .he refuses God's way of salvation and the hope of eternal life with Him."

Billy Graham, American Clergyman

Life, Hell, Optimism, Hope, Send

"The condition you're in at this moment is the product of your previous thoughts, to change your condition, change your thoughts."

Debasish Mridha, American Author

Personal Development

"Instead of clinging to the only Lifeboat that can save, we have tossed overboard biblical truths in the name of [compromise], living on the edge of life, like the man who rides the parameter of a hurricane, daring it to sweep him away."

Billy Graham, American Clergyman

Life, Instead, Clinging, Truth, Honesty

"There's one thing you can say for air pollution, you get utterly amazing sunrises."

Terry Pratchett, English Author

Life, Today, Happiness, Inspirational, Truth

"There is always a path to our target, the problem is to discover it!"

Mehmet Murat ildan, Turkish Philosopher

Life, Path, Truth, Discovery

"Things past redress are now with me past care."

William Shakespeare, English Dramatist

Life, Regret, Truth, Wisdom

"Some parts of life are lived in the shadows where the only sunlight you feel is the light you pray for."

Richelle E. Goodrich, American Poet

Life, Regret, Truth, Power, Today

"Hate is hostility."

Lailah Gifty Akita, Ghanaian Author

Life, Hate, Hostility, Heart

"Money isn't the solution to your problems. It only lets you carry your unhappiness around in style."

Shannon L. Alder, American Author

Life, Money, Problems, Unhappiness, Style

"Collect memories, they are your precious property."

Debasish Mridha, American Author

Life, Memories, Property, Precious