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George Carlin

"I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away."

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"I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away."

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Akshay Vasu

"There are the further difficulties of building a population out of a diversity of races, each at a different stage of cultural evolution, some in need of restraint, many in need of protection; everywhere a bewildering Babel of tongues."

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Personal Development

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Akshay Vasu

"The Department of Justice transcends party because we're building on the Weed and Seed program."

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Personal Development

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Akshay Vasu

"I won a scholarship with the Brixton School of Building. I screwed around, not putting in a proper attendance."

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Personal Development

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Akshay Vasu

"A building has integrity just like a man. And just as seldom."

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Personal Development

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Akshay Vasu

"Traveling is the ruin of all happiness! There's no looking at a building after seeing Italy."

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Akshay Vasu

"We have to realize we are building a movement."

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Akshay Vasu

"I collect clothes - they keep building and building. I buy them instead of having them washed."

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Akshay Vasu

"Even at the United Nations, where legend has it that the building was designed so that there could be no corner offices, the expanse of glass in individual offices is said to be a dead giveaway as to rank. Five windows are excellent, one window not so great."

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Akshay Vasu

"A screenplay is not a finished product; a novel is. A screenplay is a blueprint for something - for a building that will most likely never be built."

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Personal Development

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Akshay Vasu

"I haven't done any building designs since the Loaf House."

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George Carlin
"I'm always relieved when someone is delivering a eulogy and I realize I'm listening to it."

Listening

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George Carlin
"I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away."

Building

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George Carlin
"If it's true that our species is alone in the universe, then I'd have to say the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little."

Universe

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George Carlin
"You know an odd feeling? Sitting on the toilet eating a chocolate candy bar."

Eating

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George Carlin
"Dusting is a good example of the futility of trying to put things right. As soon as you dust, the fact of your next dusting has already been established."

Example

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George Carlin
"Weather forecast for tonight: dark."

Weather

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George Carlin
"The reason I talk to myself is that I'm the only one whose answers I accept."

Answers

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George Carlin
"Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?"

Driving

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George Carlin
"Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things."

Pet

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George Carlin
"I think it would be interesting if old people got anti-Alzheimer's disease where they slowly began to recover other people's lost memories."

People

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