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Rodney Dangerfield

"I looked up my family tree and found three dogs using it."

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"I looked up my family tree and found three dogs using it."

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Asa Don Brown

"Father, I know you will hear me, I will speak."

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Asa Don Brown

"We come into the world through a man and a woman. But life blessings us with many fathers and mothers."

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Asa Don Brown

"A new baby is a bundle of hope, a smiling imagination, and a dancing dreams."

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Asa Don Brown

"The real beauty of a house is always the happiness inside that house!"

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Asa Don Brown

"A philanderer cannot be a parent - a parent cannot be a philanderer."

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Asa Don Brown

"We grow up opposing our parents only to become like them enough to oppose our children who behave as we once did-a reminder of how dreadful we were toward those now vindicated grandparents. And you thought God had no sense of humor."

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Asa Don Brown

"A healthy world is made of healthy nations. A healthy nation is made of healthy families. And a healthy family can only be raised on the foundation of a monogamous relationship."

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Asa Don Brown

"Grandchildren are their grandparents' toys."

Explore more quotes by Rodney Dangerfield

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Rodney Dangerfield
"Most of the arguments to which I am party fall somewhat short of being impressive, knowing to the fact that neither I nor my opponent knows what we are talking about."
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Rodney Dangerfield
"I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous - everyone hasn't met me yet."
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Rodney Dangerfield
"The way my luck is running, if I was a politician I would be honest."
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Rodney Dangerfield
"What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bee and he told me about the butcher and my wife."
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Rodney Dangerfield
"I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio."
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Rodney Dangerfield
"I'm at the age where food has taken the place of sex in my life. In fact, I've just had a mirror put over my kitchen table."
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Rodney Dangerfield
"My wife is always trying to get rid of me. The other day she told me to put the garbage out. I said to her I already did. She told me to go and keep an eye on it."
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Rodney Dangerfield
"I worked in a pet store and people would ask how big I would get."
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Rodney Dangerfield
"My wife wants sex in the back of the car and she wants me to drive."
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Rodney Dangerfield
"At twenty a man is full of fight and hope. He wants to reform the world. When he is seventy he still wants to reform the world, but he know he can't."
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