"You know when they have a fishing show on TV? They catch the fish and then let it go. They don't want to eat the fish, they just want to make it late for something."

Fish, Fishing, Want

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"You know when they have a fishing show on TV? They catch the fish and then let it go. They don't want to eat the fish, they just want to make it late for something."

Exlpore more Fish quotes

"Dead fish don't swim around in jealous tides."

Scott Weiland, American Musician

Fish, Tides

"I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it."

W. C. Fields, American Comedian

Fish, Water

"Last year I went fishing with Salvador Dali. He was using a dotted line. He caught every other fish."

Steven Wright, American Comedian

Fish, Fishing

"Wherever the fish are, that's where we go."

Richard Wagner, German Composer

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"Interestingly, koi, when put in a fish bowl, will only grow up to three inches. When this same fish is placed in a large tank, it will grow to about nine inches long."

Vince Poscente, Canadian Author

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"When they see me holding fish, they can see that I am comfortable with kings as well as with paupers."

Imelda Marcos, Filipino Celebrity

Fish, Kings

"I like to fish. Fishing is always a way of relaxing."

Tom Felton, English Actor

Fish, Fishing

"What's the two things they tell you are healthiest to eat? Chicken and fish. You know what you should do? Combine them, eat a penguin."

Dave Attell, American Comedian

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"I used to have some fish, some nice little carp, but they got too big for the tank. I don't have any pets now."

Tom Felton, English Actor

Fish, Now, Pets

"New York is where you go to catch a big fish."

Jessica Cutler, American Author

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Explore more quotes by Mitch Hedberg

"People teach their dogs to sit; it's a trick. I've been sitting my whole life, and a dog has never looked at me as though he thought I was tricky."

Life

"Y'know, you can't please all the people all the time... and last night, all those people were at my show."

Time

"An escalator can never break: it can only become stairs. You should never see an Escalator Temporarily Out Of Order sign, just Escalator Temporarily Stairs. Sorry for the convenience."

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"Bologna is a deli meat for people with eyes."

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"I like to play blackjack. I'm not addicted to gambling. I'm addicted to sitting in a semi-circle."

Gambling

"When someone hands you a flyer, it's like they're saying here you throw this away."

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"I know a lot about cars, man. I can look at any car's headlights and tell you exactly which way it's coming."

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Exlpore more Fish quotes

"Dead fish don't swim around in jealous tides."

"I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it."

"Last year I went fishing with Salvador Dali. He was using a dotted line. He caught every other fish."

"Wherever the fish are, that's where we go."

"Interestingly, koi, when put in a fish bowl, will only grow up to three inches. When this same fish is placed in a large tank, it will grow to about nine inches long."

"When they see me holding fish, they can see that I am comfortable with kings as well as with paupers."

"I like to fish. Fishing is always a way of relaxing."

"What's the two things they tell you are healthiest to eat? Chicken and fish. You know what you should do? Combine them, eat a penguin."

"I used to have some fish, some nice little carp, but they got too big for the tank. I don't have any pets now."

"New York is where you go to catch a big fish."

Explore more quotes by Mitch Hedberg

"If my kid couldn't draw I'd make sure that my kitchen magnets didn't work."

"I wear a necklace, cause I wanna know when I'm upside down."

"I like Kit-Kat, unless I'm with four or more people."

"People teach their dogs to sit; it's a trick. I've been sitting my whole life, and a dog has never looked at me as though he thought I was tricky."

"Y'know, you can't please all the people all the time... and last night, all those people were at my show."

"An escalator can never break: it can only become stairs. You should never see an Escalator Temporarily Out Of Order sign, just Escalator Temporarily Stairs. Sorry for the convenience."

"Bologna is a deli meat for people with eyes."

"I like to play blackjack. I'm not addicted to gambling. I'm addicted to sitting in a semi-circle."

"When someone hands you a flyer, it's like they're saying here you throw this away."

"I know a lot about cars, man. I can look at any car's headlights and tell you exactly which way it's coming."