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Exlpore more Fish quotes

"I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it."

"Last year I went fishing with Salvador Dali. He was using a dotted line. He caught every other fish."

"Interestingly, koi, when put in a fish bowl, will only grow up to three inches. When this same fish is placed in a large tank, it will grow to about nine inches long."

"When they see me holding fish, they can see that I am comfortable with kings as well as with paupers."

"What's the two things they tell you are healthiest to eat? Chicken and fish. You know what you should do? Combine them, eat a penguin."
Fish,
Explore more quotes by Mitch Hedberg

"People teach their dogs to sit; it's a trick. I've been sitting my whole life, and a dog has never looked at me as though he thought I was tricky."

"Y'know, you can't please all the people all the time... and last night, all those people were at my show."

"An escalator can never break: it can only become stairs. You should never see an Escalator Temporarily Out Of Order sign, just Escalator Temporarily Stairs. Sorry for the convenience."

"I like to play blackjack. I'm not addicted to gambling. I'm addicted to sitting in a semi-circle."

"I know a lot about cars, man. I can look at any car's headlights and tell you exactly which way it's coming."
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