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"You look like a talent scout for a cemetery."
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"There is no substitute for talent. Industry and all its virtues are of no avail."

"Talent is an art of gaining admiration!"

"You need to find your gift, something you are doing better than others."

"We're all geniuses. Life is merely overpopulated with singers who play drums, and, drummers who sing, to pay rent."
Explore more quotes by Henny Youngman


"My other brother-in-law died. He was a karate expert, then joined the army. The first time he saluted, he killed himself."


"Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll give you a little love, a little affection, a little tenderness? It means you're in the wrong house, that's what it means."


"My grandmother is over eighty and still doesn't need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle."


"If you're going to do something tonight that you'll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late."
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