"Susan's gotta poker, you know," it said, as if anxious to be helpful. WELL, WELL. INDEED. MY GOODNESS ME. week she picked up a bogey by its nose."Death tried to imagine this. He felt sure he'd heard the sentence wrong, but it didn't sound a whole lot better however he rearranged the words."

Absurdity, Humor, Death, Wisdom, Truth

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"Susan's gotta poker, you know," it said, as if anxious to be helpful. WELL, WELL. INDEED. MY GOODNESS ME. week she picked up a bogey by its nose."Death tried to imagine this. He felt sure he'd heard the sentence wrong, but it didn't sound a whole lot better however he rearranged the words."

Exlpore more Absurdity quotes

"He was dead. However, his nose throbbed painfully, which he thought odd in the circumstances."

Diana Gabaldon, American Author

Absurdity, Death, Irony, Body, Consciousness

"Bursar?"Yes, Archchancellor?"You ain't a member of some secret society or somethin', are you?"Me? No, Archchancellor."Then it'd be a damn good idea to take your underpants off your head."

Terry Pratchett, English Author

Absurdity, Humor, Truth, Wisdom, Power

"It was an awkward moment. We were burning down our host's house, a situation which any guest seeks to avoid."

Tahir Shah, British Author

Absurdity, Irony, Humor, Chaos

"Sometimes I have believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast."

Lewis Carroll, English Author

Absurdity, Impossibility, Wonder, Imagination, Belief

"You know how spooky Ashwini is. She called an hour ago to tell me she has a secret stash of handheld grenade launchers she thought I might want to know about. My response was, 'What the fuck?"

Nalini Singh, New Zealander Author

Absurdity, Humor, Surprise, Conversation

"In some warped way, having an embalmed body with us made perfect sense."

Tahir Shah, British Author

Absurdity, Death, Grief, Acceptance

"I've been a little cranky since that house fell on my sister."

Lois Greiman, American Author

Absurdity, Humor, Loss, Irony

"Well, I think I speak for everyone when I say that 'Alice Faye picked a peck of pepper for the poor, piping pig in the purple poke.' Wait-is that not what we're talking about here?"

Elle Lothlorien, American Novelist

Absurdity, Humor, Nonsense, Confusion

"Only by living absurdly is it possible to break out of this infinite absurdity."

Julio Cortazar, Argentinian Writer

Absurdity, Infinite, Living

"All persons, living and dead, are purely coincidental."

Kurt Vonnegut, American Author

Absurdity, Life, Death, Identity, Existence

Explore more quotes by Terry Pratchett

"But you can't just leave it at that!" said Anathema, pushing forward. "Think of all things you could do! Good things."Like what?" said Adam suspiciously."Well... you could bring all the whales back, to start with."He put his head on one side. "An' that'd stop people killing them?"She hesitated. It would have been nice to say yes."An' if people do start killing 'em, what would you ask me to do about 'em?" said Adam. "No. I reckon I'm getting the hang of this now. Once I start messing around like that, there'd be no stoppin' it. Seems to me, the only sensible thing is for people to know if they kill a whale, they've got a dead whale."

Ethics

"Anyway, it's like with bikes,' said the first speaker authoritatively. 'I thought I was going to get this bike with seven gears and one of them razorblade saddles and purple paint and everything, and they gave me this light blue one. With a basket. A girl's bike.''Well. You're a girl,' said one of the others.'That's sexism, that is. Going around giving people girly presents just because they're a girl."

Change

"Always be wary of any helpful item that weighs less than its operating manual."

Humor

"One cannot help feeling that some alternative occupation-lettuce farming, say-would offer somewhat less of a risk of being put to death by installments. Why do you persist in it?Goldeneyes Dactylos shrugged."I'm good at it, he said."

Purpose

"Writing is the most fun you can have by yourself."

Writing

"I believe the term is 'eminent domain.'Ah, yes. That means 'theft by the government."

Politics

"It's all about balance, do you see? Balance is the trick. Keep the balance and - " she stopped. "You've ridden on a seesaw? One end goes up, one end goes down. But the bit in the middle, that stays where it is. Upness and downness go right through it. Don't matter how high or low the ends go, it keeps the balance." She sniffed. "Magic is mostly movin' stuff around."

Life

"Sometimes thinking is like talking to another person, but that person is also you."

Wisdom

"Questions don't have to make sense, Vincent," said Miss Susan. "But answers do."

Wisdom

"Dwarfs were not a naturally religious species, but in a world where pit props could crack without warning and pockets of fire damp could suddenly explode they'd seen the need for gods as the sort of supernatural equivalent of a hard hat. Besides, when you hit your thumb with an eight-pound hammer it's nice to be able to blaspheme. It takes a very special and strong-minded kind of atheist to jump up and down with their hand clasped under their other armpit and shout, "Oh, random-fluctuations-in-the-space-time-continuum!" or "Aaargh, primitive-and-outmoded-concept on a crutch!"

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