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Steven Wright

"I watched the Indy 500, and I was thinking that if they left earlier they wouldn't have to go so fast."

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"I watched the Indy 500, and I was thinking that if they left earlier they wouldn't have to go so fast."

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Amber Hurdle

"There is a rich literature on how to break out of quandary thinking. It suggests that sometimes it helps to turn from the abstract to the concrete."

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Amber Hurdle

"You don't do anything thinking that it's going to stick."

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Amber Hurdle

"Insomnia is a gross feeder. It will nourish itself on any kind of thinking, including thinking about not thinking."

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Amber Hurdle

"After all,'I've been thinking' meant she had previously identified the parameters and analyzed all the branching considerations."

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Amber Hurdle

"Don't think you are going to go on forever because you are not and begin to plan something that will compensate as you reduce your capacities to leap or turn on this or that or the other, begin thinking of something else."

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Amber Hurdle

"I don't think we have very good records about what they were thinking except, as I pointed out earlier today, that they did invent our political system."

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Amber Hurdle

"When I think of all the years in my 30s when I starved myself... but when I got the role of Lois, I stopped thinking about my looks and was just myself."

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Amber Hurdle

"I'm never a person who likes anything I've done. It's just the way it is. Twenty years later, I can look at something I did, and I'm still thinking, 'You know, that could have been better if you had done it this way or that way."

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Amber Hurdle

"Thinking no longer means anymore than checking at each moment whether one can indeed think."

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Amber Hurdle

"When I got to filmmaking, the most democratic of environments where anybody could say anything, those were the best environments, but what you don't want to assume is that you know what the audience is thinking."

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Steven Wright
"What happens if you get scared half to death twice?"
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Steven Wright
"People may think I'm trying something new by telling stories, but they're just jokes connected to give the illusion of stories. But really, I just continue using my imagination and creating. That's what I do."
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Steven Wright
"You know those things that you throw the twigs into and it spits them out? That's what I do. The branches are like life, and I throw them into my head and some of it comes out as humor."
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Steven Wright
"I just got out of the hospital. I was in a speed reading accident. I hit a book mark and flew across the room."
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Steven Wright
"I don't feel that I'm explaining the world or teaching people anything. And I'm not trying to be a mirror, showing them what's really going on the world. All I'm trying to do is think of stuff that's funny, just like when I'm kidding around with my friends."
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Steven Wright
"It doesn't matter what temperature a room is, it's always room temperature."
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Steven Wright
"The other night I was lying in bed, looking up at the stars, and I wondered, 'Where the hell is my roof?"
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Steven Wright
"I paint; I draw and paint - I've been doing that since I was in third grade, drawing realistically and then changing to abstract art. That was my first creative thing before guitar or comedy."
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Steven Wright
"If at first you don't succeed then skydiving definitely isn't for you."
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Steven Wright
"I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder."
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