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"Have you ever Googled yourself? I did, most depressing thing ever. People have websites hoping I die at 38."
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"The point of drinking in moderation is that sometimes you don't drink in moderation."
Drink
"I'm not going to lie to you fellas, I've been drinking."
Lie
"When I black out, it's the happiest time of my life."
Life
"Have you ever Googled yourself? I did, most depressing thing ever. People have websites hoping I die at 38."
People
"I have been in a lot of movies, but none of them are critics' darlings, you might say."
Movies
"And now it looks like I'm probably going to shoot a movie that I wrote. I got the money to do it, and I would star and all, because of being on Howard."
Money
"Vegas means comedy, tragedy, happiness and sadness all at the same time."
Happiness
"It is funny because the guy who is my boss now, Howard Stern, has a similarity there. He got big being a regular guy. He wasn't the greatest looking guy in the world."
Funny
"A weekend in Vegas without gambling and drinking is just like being a born-again Christian."
Christian
"The regular guy still relates to him and Howard is a $500 million guy now who dates a model and drives about in a limo all day. But Howard still knows how to make a plumber laugh and those guys still have him on in the morning, because he is a real talent."
Talent
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"The people who are absent are the ideal; those who are present seem to be quite commonplace."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Often people display a curious respect for a man drunk, rather like the respect of simple races for the insane... There is something awe-inspiring in one who has lost all inhibitions."
Author Name
Personal Development
"The last resort of kings, the cannonball. The last resort of the people, the paving stone."
Author Name
Personal Development
"It is not true that people are naturally equal for no two people can be together for even a half an hour without one acquiring an evident superiority over the other."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Other people's beliefs may be myths, but not mine."
Author Name
Personal Development
"There are bad people who would be less dangerous if they were quite devoid of goodness."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Whatever good things people say of us, they tell us nothing new."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I do not want people to be very agreeable, as it saves me the trouble of liking them a great deal."
Author Name
Personal Development
"We don't get to know people when they come to us; we must go to them to find out what they are like."
Author Name
Personal Development
"There are only two kinds of people who are really fascinating - people who know absolutely everything, and people who know absolutely nothing."
Author Name
Personal Development
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