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"The man with the real sense of humor is the man who can put himself in the spectator's place and laugh at his own misfortune."
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"Playing Solitaire is a non-smoking employee's smoke break."
"I've accepted the fact I have mental illness but when my imaginary friends start calling me crazy that's where I draw the line."
"I laugh for sheer medicinal purposes, because I feel I might die otherwise."
"Extolling the virtues of conservation of energy, Churchill advised, "Never stand when you can sit, and never sit when you can lie down."
"Hey, guard! Ian hollered out loud. "Do you think we could get a bathroom break? The guard seemed to snicker as he pointed to the grass outside the cell. Eena smirked at how dead-on her thoughts had been after all. "Come on, Ian complained. "She can't do that, she's a girl. The soldier smiled wryly, a shrug communicating his indifference. Eena laughed in her mind. (I don't know what you think's so funny. You're the one who's gotta pee.) Oddly enough, that fact just made her laugh even more."
"Did you talk to him about it?""Oh, sure. Nothing happened, yadda yadda. The usual. But my maydar went off like crazy.""Maydar?""As in, he may be thinking about super hot sex with her. Like radar, only not as sure."
Explore more quotes by Bert Williams
"I have never been able to discover anything disgraceful in being a colored man. But I have often found it inconvenient - in America."
"The man with the real sense of humor is the man who can put himself in the spectator's place and laugh at his own misfortune."
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