"It's colder than a witch's tit in a steel bra."

Humor, Weather, Expression, Cold

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"It's colder than a witch's tit in a steel bra."

Exlpore more Humor quotes

"If it weren't for the last minute nothing would get done."

Anonymous, Unknown Unknown

Humor, Procrastination, Delay, Action

"And if I talk to him, I'll say something wrong, give something away. I can feel it coming, a betrayal of myself."

Margaret Atwood, Canadian Novelist

Humor, Escape, Solitude, Space, Privacy

"God alert!" Blackjack yelled. "It's the wine dude!Mr. D sighed in exasperation. "The next person, or horse, who calls me the 'wine dude' will end up in a bottle of Merlot!"

Rick Riordan, American Novelist

Humor, Truth, Wisdom, Power

"I always try to cheer myself up by singing when i get sad. Most of the time, it turns out that my voice is worse than my problems."

Anonymous, Unknown Unknown

Humor, Singing, Sadness, Voice

"When you love someone, you don't care that she ate your sandwich. You only hope she found it delicious."

Richelle E. Goodrich, American Poet

Humor, Love, Happiness, Today, Truth

"Looking for a wife is like fishing; before you go, make sure you don't have a hole in your net."

Matshona Dhliwayo, Zimbabwean Philosopher

Humor, Marriage, Fishing, Perspective

"Some kleptomaniacs do not steal things only; they also, while some only, steal lovers."

Mokokoma Mokhonoana, South African Philosopher

Humor, Truth, Life, Power, Wisdom

"Cleanliness becomes more important when godliness is unlikely."

P. J. O'Rourke, American Comedian

Humor, Cleanliness, Observation, Realism

"You know, Aunt Tasha makes jokes about how youE1d actually be a better queen than the others, except sometimes . . . I donE1t think sheE1s joking."

Richelle Mead, American Author

Humor, Jokes, Comparison, Family

"A tie is what you get after ice cubes have wrestled with hot water."

Mokokoma Mokhonoana, South African Philosopher

Humor, Truth, Life, Happiness

Explore more quotes by David Levithan

"I don't like to do what people expect. Why should I live up to their expectations instead of my own?"

Identity, Expectation, Self, Individual, Freedom

"Her mind is an unquiet one, words and thoughts and impulses constantly crashing into each other."

Psychology, Mind, Chaos, Thought, Emotion

"When you need to hold onto something, you should. Whatever gets you through, take it."

Survival, Support, Hope, Strength

"I had yet to learn that when it came to gender, I was both and neither."

Identity, Gender, Self, Understanding

"It doesn't work, she continues, unclasping her hands, smoothing her skirt. "What you're feeling right now doesn't work. You can't wander around and think the wandering will call them back. Believe me. I know you don't want to hear the long view, but let me tell you. You are so young. I know it's none of my business. But still."

Wisdom, Feeling, Youth, Advice, Hope

"Let's always love each other, and never be in love with each other."

Relationship, Love, Connection, Emotion

"I hate that would. Straight. At the very least, those of us who are nonstraight should get to be called curvy. Or scenic. Actually, I like that: 'Do you think she's straight?' 'Oh no. She's scenic."

Identity, Humor, Acceptance, Diversity

"We all want everything to be okay. We don't even wish so much for fantastic or marvelous or outstanding. We will happily settle for okay, because most of the time, okay is enough."

Acceptance, Contentment, Life, Simplicity

"There are friends, but they are people to spend time with, not people to share time with."

Friendship, Time, Relationship, Social

"...It's just nice to see you out from his shadow. Because things don't grow in the shadows, you know? So it was frustrating to see you standing there...and really cool to see you step out of it. I don't know who this new guy is, but make sure when you're with him, you're not standing in his shadow. Stand where everyone can see you."

Self, Shadow, Identity, Growth, Visibility