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Exlpore more Dogs quotes
"To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs."
"Asthma doesn't seem to bother me any more unless I'm around cigars or dogs. The thing that would bother me most would be a dog smoking a cigar."
"I've got nine kids, nine dogs, three grandkids - and one in the oven. And three parrots!"
"I also have two dogs, a Chihuahua and a Yorkshire terrier, so if they like him, that's a good sign."
Dogs,
Explore more quotes by Mitch Hedberg
"I was at this casino minding my own business, and this guy came up to me and said, "You're gonna have to move, you're blocking a fire exit." As though if there was a fire, I wasn't gonna run. If you're flammible and have legs, you are never blocking a fire exit."
"Every time I go and shave, I assume there's someone else on the planet shaving. So I say, 'I'm gonna go shave, too.'"
"I wish my name was Brian because maybe sometimes people would misspell my name and call me Brain. That's like a free compliment and you don't even gotta be smart to notice it."
"Wearing a turtleneck is like being strangled by a really weak guy, all day. Wearing a backpack and a turtleneck is like a weak midget trying to bring you down."
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