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"He smiles, and he's made of trouble. We should have dropped him in the Thames in a bag of stones. We should have left him out for the fairies."
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Personal Development

"Rogerson," I asked him sweetly as we sat watching a video in the pool house, "where would I find the pelagic zone?""In the open sea," he said. "Now shut up and eat your Junior Mints."
Author Name
Personal Development

"Playing Solitaire is a non-smoking employee's smoke break."
Author Name
Personal Development

"The fun we'll have tonight is called figging."
Author Name
Personal Development

"Wit is the only wall between us and the dark."
Author Name
Personal Development

"If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee."
Author Name
Personal Development

"I liked the humor of it, I've always enjoyed a sense of humor in God and in religion and in spirituality."
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Personal Development

"I just meant maybe you could set here and drink one of em with me.He squinted at her. You ever notice how women have trouble takin no for a answer? I think itstarts about age three.What about men?They get used to it. They better."
Author Name
Personal Development

"A sense of humor keen enough to show a man his own absurdities will keep him from the commission of all sins, or nearly all, save those worth committing."
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Personal Development

"Christ and The Church: If he were to apply for a divorce on the grounds of cruelty, adultery and desertion, he would probably get one."
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Personal Development
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"We do not deny any nation's legitimate interest in security. But protecting the security of one nation by robbing another of its national independence and national traditions is not legitimate. In the long run, it is not even secure."
Politics


"Government's first duty is to protect the people, not run their lives."
Freedom


"Above all, we must realize that no arsenal, or no weapon in the arsenals of the world, is so formidable as the will and moral courage of free men and women. It is a weapon our adversaries in today's world do not have."
Freedom


"Entrepreneurs and their small enterprises are responsible for almost all the economic growth in the United States."
Leadership


"We should measure welfare's success by how many people leave welfare, not by how many are added."
Business


"The taxpayer - that's someone who works for the federal government but doesn't have to take the civil service examination."
Business


"Inflation is as violent as a mugger, as frightening as an armed robber and as deadly as a hit man."
Business


"I've often said there's nothing better for the inside of a man than the outside of a horse."
Humor


"Some people wonder all their lives if they've made a difference. The Marines don't have that problem."
Leadership


"Violence has been Nicaragua's most important export to the world."
War
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