"The easiest way for your children to learn about money is for you not to have any."

"The best careers advice to give to the young is 'Find out what you like doing best and get someone to pay you for doing it.'"

"I am firm. You are obstinate. He is a pig-headed fool."

"Americans, indeed, often seem to be so overwhelmed by their children that they'll do anything for them except stay married to the co-producer."

"The disease is painless; it's the cure that hurts."

"No nice men are good at getting taxis."

"The rule is not to talk about money with people who have much more or much less than you."

"Why do born-again people so often make you wish they'd never been born the first time?"

"Have you ever taken something out of the clothes hamper because it had become, relatively, the cleanest thing?"

"A food is not necessarily essential just because your child hates it."

"A good listener is not someone with nothing to say. A good listener is a good talker with a sore throat."

"From a commercial point of view, if Christmas did not exist it would be necessary to invent it."

"There are some circles in America where it seems to be more socially acceptable to carry a hand-gun than a packet of cigarettes."

"Outside every thin woman is a fat man trying to get in."