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Exlpore more Family quotes
"Of course, everyone's parents are embarrassing. It goes with the territory. The nature of parents is to embarrass merely by existing, just as it is the nature of children of a certain age to cringe with embarrassment, shame, and mortification should their parents so much as speak to them on the street."
"The arrangements that couples make in order to maintain civility in the midst of their journey to divorce are often most elaborate when the professed top priority is to protect a child."
"No father knows that he is carrying his son up the stairs for the final time."
"All happy families resemble one another, each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way."
"A wise woman protects her kids. A wiser woman hangs out with police officers, retired FBI agents and private investigators."
"Fear is the mother of morality."
"He who loses his mother loses a pure soul who blesses and guards him constantly."
Explore more quotes by Emo Philips
"I was walking down fifth avenue today and I found a wallet, and I was gonna keep it, rather than return it, but I thought: well, if I lost a hundred and fifty dollars, how would I feel? And I realized I would want to be taught a lesson."
"Actually, my cd was released in 1985, in return for two German missionaries and a Dutch urologist."
"I discovered my wife in bed with another man, and I was crushed. So I said, 'Get off me, you two!'"
"I love to go to the playground and watch the children jumping up and down. They don't know I'm firing blanks."
"I asked my girlfriend, 'Will you marry me?' She said, 'We'll have to ask my father.' So we had a seance and Jack Ruby says, 'Hello!'"
"Probably the toughest time in anyone's life is when you have to murder a loved one because they're the devil."
"I once heard two ladies going on and on about the pains of childbirth and how men don't seem to know what real pain is. I asked if either of them ever got themselves caught in a zipper."
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