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"He looked so frustrated and perfectly serious, and yet here we were talking about his missing seal pelt."
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"The real satire starts when I'm shockingly mocked,not mockingly shocked."

"CHARTERIS [unfolding his arms in terror] No, please. Dont. As a philosopher, it's my business to tell other people the truth; but it's not their business to tell it to me. I dont like it: it hurts."

"How was I supposed to know 'lucked out' means 'I got screwed over' in Australian?"

"I believe the phrase you're looking for is 'too much money and not enough things to spend it on."

"Where did you find that one?''I have no idea. I'm a magnet for crazies, I guess.''They must be able to sense a kindred spirit.''Your one to talk. Don't you have more hordes of the undead to lead in a glorious revolution?''Zombies not undead. There's a fine distinction. And no. Right now I'm scouting new talent. The glorious revolution comes tomorrow."

"I realized women and humor were linked very closely."

"A good joke doesn't necessarily need appreciation from others. One can freely laugh at one's own deserving jokes."

"Vampires. Honestly, they're like children sometimes."
Explore more quotes by Katherine McIntyre

"Alanna Carrington, head witch of the Philadelphia Coven, hurtled his way, and with her, trouble was a guarantee."

"She glanced outside at the sky, filled with clouds and smog. All the pollution, all that hell - even the stars didn't stand a chance."

"Better to leave with good memories than have the last ones be the embarrassing, smoking ruin of what once had been a fantastic friendship."

"Luckily, common sense had never been a strong suit of mine and my feet moved faster than my brain."

"If you're supposed to work with someone, I'd recommend not getting all hot and bothered with them the night before. The word of the day was 'tense."

"Geoff's arm emanated with a solid warmth I longed for after our days aboard S.S. British - Craphole."

"The choice lay out for me. Stay on land or plunge into the icy depths of the sea. I always chose the sea."

"Go figure, that happened to be his same style of flirtation as well - annoy her half to death until, before she could stop herself, she confessed her deep darks and bonded with him to a degree she never had before."

"Once upon a time, he might've chased her and tumbled her in the sheets with the promise of more in the future."
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