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Henny Youngman

"A self-taught man usually has a poor teacher and a worse student."

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"A self-taught man usually has a poor teacher and a worse student."

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Amber Hurdle

"When a man is wrapped up in himself, he makes a pretty small package."

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Amber Hurdle

"All free men, wherever they may live, are citizens of Berlin. And therefore, as a free man, I take pride in the words "Ich bin ein Berliner!""

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Amber Hurdle

"Most people know no other way of judging men's worth but by the vogue they are in, or the fortunes they have met with."

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Amber Hurdle

"The historian must have some conception of how men who are not historians behave. Otherwise he will move in a world of the dead. He can only gain that conception through personal experience, and he can only use his personal experiences when he is a genius."

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Amber Hurdle

"A man seldom thinks with more earnestness of anything than he does of his dinner."

Man,
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Amber Hurdle

"I hold the world but as the world, Gratiano; A stage where every man must play a part, And mine is a sad one."

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Amber Hurdle

"What a man believes may be ascertained, not from his creed, but from the assumptions on which he habitually acts."

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Amber Hurdle

"A sudden bold and unexpected question doth many times surprise a man and lay him open."

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Amber Hurdle

"A great many men's gratitude is nothing but a secret desire to hook in more valuable kindnesses hereafter."

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Amber Hurdle

"Pain is as diverse as man. One suffers as one can."

Explore more quotes by Henny Youngman

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Henny Youngman
"I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back."
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Henny Youngman
"Why do Jewish divorces cost so much? They're worth it."
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Henny Youngman
"My other brother-in-law died. He was a karate expert, then joined the army. The first time he saluted, he killed himself."
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Henny Youngman
"Just got back from a pleasure trip: I took my mother-in-law to the airport."
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Henny Youngman
"If you had your life to live over again, do it overseas."
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Henny Youngman
"If my mother knew I did this for a living, she'd kill me. She thinks I'm selling dope."
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Henny Youngman
"I've been in love with the same woman for forty-one years. If my wife finds out, she'll kill me."
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Henny Youngman
"A Jewish woman had two chickens. One got sick, so the woman made chicken soup out of the other one to help the sick one get well."
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Henny Youngman
"You have a ready wit. Tell me when it's ready."
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Henny Youngman
"You have a nice personality, but not for a human being."
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