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"An extreme optimist is a man who believes that humanity will probably survive even if it doesn't take his advice."
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"With regard to navigating relationship's highways and bi-ways - avoid changing lanes without first giving a signal."
"Never give anyone the advice to buy or sell shares, because the most benevolent price of advice can turn out badly."
"Never take advice about never taking advice. That is an old vice of men - to dish it out without being able to take it - the blind leading the blind into more blindness."
"Drink because you are happy, but never because you are miserable. Never drink when you are wretched without it, or you will be like the grey-faced gin-drinker in the slum; but drink when you would be happy without it, and you will be like the laughing peasant of Italy. Never drink because you need it, for this is rational drinking, and the way to death and hell. But drink because you do not need it, for this is irrational drinking, and the ancient health of the world."
"Carrot Top... I gave him advice once and he ran with it. He should thank me."
"My advice to you is not to inquire why or whither, but just enjoy your ice cream while it's on your plate."
Explore more quotes by John McCarthy
"Alas few socialists are either benevolent enough to work hard at these occupations out of benevolence or self-interested enough to work hard at them for money."
"The peace movement is a great force for peace. Some of the world's most quarrelsome people act out their aggressions through the peace movement."
"We modern Marxists regard socialism as a historically brief transitional stage between feudalism and capitalism, necessary only in backward countries."
"Soccer riots kill at most tens. Intellectuals' ideological riots sometimes kill millions."
"Slogans rarely convince the unconvinced. However, they do rally the troops already on your side."
"There is only one thing more harmful to society than an elected official forgetting the promises he made in order to get elected; that's when he doesn't forget them."
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