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"There are times when one would like to hang the whole human race, and finish the farce."
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"A person will sometimes devote all his life to the development of one part of his body - the wishbone."

"Self-pity in its early stages is as snug as a feather mattress. Only when it hardens does it become uncomfortable."

"It is better to take what does not belong to you than to let it lie around neglected."

"Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference."

"The Senator from Massachusetts has given us ample grounds to doubt the judgment and the attitude he brings to bear on vital issues of national security."

"Patton was living in the Dark Ages. Soldiers were peasants to him. I didn't like that attitude."
Explore more quotes by Mark Twain

"The trouble ain't that there is too many fools, but that the lightning ain't distributed right."

"T[he rules of writing] require that the personages in a tale shall be alive, except in the case of corpses, and that always the reader shall be able to tell the corpses from the others."

"April 1. This is the day upon which we are reminded of what we are on the other three hundred and sixty-four."

"The darling mispronunciations of childhood! - dear me, there's no music that can touch it; and how one grieves when it wastes away and dissolves into correctness, knowing it will never visit his bereaved ear again."

"A public library is the most enduring of memorials, the trustiest monument for the preservation of an event or a name or an affection; for it, and it only, is respected by wars and revolutions, and survives."
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