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"I just want to get away from me."
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"That's where thinking started, where thinking stopped, where all her prayers so long ago had dried up. She no longer prayed, nor even dreamed of changing her father. Her dreams now played variations on the theme of escape. And they were nothing more than that -just dreams, just play. She'd been alone at the end of her dreams so many times before and never had God helped her escape her father, because God couldn't, because she would never escape her need to love him."

"My eyes, my brain seek out escape routes wherever I am sent."

"So I draw because I feel like it might be my only real chance to escape the reservation."

"Every unpleasant worldly experience in life exposes our sensitive nervous systems to painful phenomena. Despite all the beer commercial advertisement slogans urging us to live with gusto, life is unavoidably painful. Life is a battering ram that inflicts trauma upon human beings. People blunt the traumatic force of enduring a lifetime of pain, fearfulness, and unremitted anguish and boredom with religion, sex, booze, drugs, fantasy, and other indulgent acts and forms acts of escapism."

"After all, the appeal to stop being yourself, even for a little while, is very great,' he said. 'To escape the cognitive mode of experience, to transcend the accident to one's moment of being. There are other advantages, more difficult to speak of, things which ancient sources only hint at and which I myself only understood after the fact."
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"And then he's somewhere inside of me, each thrust rattling my ribcage like a bottle of pills. I'm somewhere outside of myself, thinking about lust- about my slutty white sheets and all the men who like to hide in them."

"Then I drop to my knees because I can't find a decent enough reason not to, because reluctance rarely stands a chance against repeated behavior."

"We skip school and we ditch chores. We haunt shopping malls and grocery stores. House parties grow dull, but Amy's boyfriend is a dealer and we find ways to pass the time."

"I think it's imperative that we continue confusing light with meaning. That's how the human race evolves. Someone sees a light, names it God, goes toward it, goes up in flames. Same goes for moths. We're all animals. There's nothing revolutionary about evolution. The process itself relies solely on stupidity. We fuck up in the hopes that future fuckups will learn from us."

"I know it sounds a bit trite, but I really do get everything I want now. They say life is a game, and I guess I might agree if the stakes were a little higher, but it's just so easy to fall into a cycle. I get bored."

"You preach cleanliness,so I try to keep my room clean,but I feel no closer to God, and I guess that's okaybecause he doesn't knowwho he's fucking with anyway."

"I've always wanted to be the sort of boy who does the right thing without having to think about it first, the kind of boy who makes his bed every morning and wears his mouth like a vase for words of kindness and simplicity. My agents keep telling me I'm too bruised to play the part. They have no idea how hard it is to make my bed when I'm constantly sleeping in yours, how difficult it is to keep my body from bruising when I'm almost always on my knees, making room in my vase for you, and watching while you text all the boys who are up for the role."
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