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Virginia Woolf

"Humor is the first of the gifts to perish in a foreign tongue."

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"Humor is the first of the gifts to perish in a foreign tongue."

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Amber Hurdle

"Rogerson," I asked him sweetly as we sat watching a video in the pool house, "where would I find the pelagic zone?""In the open sea," he said. "Now shut up and eat your Junior Mints."

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Amber Hurdle

"Playing Solitaire is a non-smoking employee's smoke break."

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Personal Development

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Amber Hurdle

"If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee."

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Personal Development

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Amber Hurdle

"A sense of humor keen enough to show a man his own absurdities will keep him from the commission of all sins, or nearly all, save those worth committing."

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Personal Development

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Amber Hurdle

"Christ and The Church: If he were to apply for a divorce on the grounds of cruelty, adultery and desertion, he would probably get one."

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Personal Development

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Amber Hurdle

"England has forty-two religions and only two sauces."

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Amber Hurdle

"God is a comedian playing to an audience that is too afraid to laugh."

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Amber Hurdle

"And then Mum spoons the coffee a little as if she's having fantasies of flinging it in Britt-Marie's face. But in a controlled way."

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Amber Hurdle

"Stupidity is brief and guileless, while wit equivocates and hides. Wit is a scoundrel, while stupidity is honest and sincere."

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Amber Hurdle

"I say let the world go to hell, but I should always have my tea."

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Virginia Woolf
"He would argue with her about killing themselves; and explain how wicked people were; how he could see them making up lies as they passed in the street. He knew all their thoughts, he said; he knew everything. He knew the meaning of the world, he said."

Art

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Virginia Woolf
"Freedom and fullness of expression are of the essence of the art."

Art

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Virginia Woolf
"One should be a painter. As a writer, I feel the beauty, which is almost entirely colour, very subtle, very changeable, running over my pen, as if you poured a large jug of champagne over a hairpin."

Art

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Virginia Woolf
"The taste for books was an early one. As a child he was sometimes found at midnight by a page still reading. They took his taper away, and he bred glow-worms to serve his purpose. They took the glow-worms away and he almost burnt the house down with a tinder."

Romance

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Virginia Woolf
"Pale, with dark hair, the one who is coming is melancholy, romantic. And I am arch and fluent and capricious; for he is melancholy, he is romantic. He is here."

Romance

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Virginia Woolf
"Nothing induces me to read a novel except when I have to make money by writing about it. I detest them."

Money

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Virginia Woolf
"Lily was listening; Mrs. Ramsay was listening; they were all listening. But already bored, Lily felt that something was lacking; Mr. Bankes felt that something was lacking. Pulling her shawl round her Mrs. Ramsay felt that something was lacking. All of them bending themselves to listen thought, "Pray heaven that the inside of my mind may not be exposed," for each thought, "The others are feeling this. They are outraged and indignant with the government about the fishermen. Whereas, I feel nothing at all."

Literature

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Virginia Woolf
"I spent an hour looking at pots and carpets in the museums the other day, until the desire to describe them became like the desire for the lusts of the flesh."

Creativity

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Virginia Woolf
"To enjoy freedom we have to control ourselves."

Control

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Virginia Woolf
"He is limp and damp and milder than the breath of a cow."

Humor

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