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"Let's reintroduce corporal punishment in the schools - and use it on the teachers."
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"Isn't watching sacred potential kill itself as good a punishment as eternal fire?"
"Just vengeance does not call for punishment."
"But I knew if I ran I'd never be able to sing, so I had to take my punishment."
"If you're going to do something wrong, do it big, because the punishment is the same either way."
"Extraordinary afflictions are not always the punishment of extraordinary sins, but sometimes the trial of extraordinary graces."
"The principle inherent in the clause that prohibits pointless infliction of excessive punishment when less severe punishment can adequately achieve the same purposes invalidates the punishment."
"I contend that it's impossible to read the Sermon on the Mount and not come out against capital punishment."
"I think capital punishment works great. Every killer you kill never kills again."
"The liar's punishment is not in the least that he is not believed, but that he cannot believe anyone else."
"Well, there's no one at all, they do be saying, but is deserving of some punishment from the very minute of his birth."
Explore more quotes by P. J. O'Rourke
"I come from Toledo, Ohio, a town that has been hurt badly by the shift of the automobile business towards Japan. And yet I remember how the car workers lived in the neighborhood that I grew up in. My father was a car salesman, and I remember how we lived. I remember how modestly we lived."
"The problem, when comparing contemporary television to television in 1974, is that TV has become not just bad but sad."
"Ideology, politics and journalism, which luxuriate in failure, are impotent in the face of hope and joy."
"There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380 SL convertible."
"The Nobel Peace Prize has always been a joke - albeit a grim one. Alfred Bernhard Nobel famously invented dynamite and felt sorry about it."
"In our brief national history we have shot four of our presidents, worried five of them to death, impeached one and hounded another out of office. And when all else fails, we hold an election and assassinate their character."
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