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Fred Allen

"Life, in my estimation, is a biological misadventure that we terminate on the shoulders of six strange men whose only objective is to make a hole in one with you."

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"Life, in my estimation, is a biological misadventure that we terminate on the shoulders of six strange men whose only objective is to make a hole in one with you."

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Asa Don Brown

"The doctrine that all men are, in any sense, or have been, at any time, free and equal, is an utterly baseless fiction."

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"Logical consequences are the scarecrows of fools and the beacons of wise men."

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Asa Don Brown

"Wine hath drowned more men than the sea."

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"I cannot help fearing that men may reach a point where they look on every new theory as a danger, every innovation as a toilsome trouble, every social advance as a first step toward revolution, and that they may absolutely refuse to move at all."

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Asa Don Brown

"When women go wrong, men go right after them."

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Asa Don Brown

"It is the dissimilarities and inequalities among men which give rise to the notion of honor; as such differences become less, it grows feeble; and when they disappear, it will vanish too."

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Asa Don Brown

"People talk about the courage of condemned men walking to the place of execution: sometimes it needs as much courage to walk with any kind of bearing towards another person's habitual misery."

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Asa Don Brown

"He had read much, if one considers his long life; but his contemplation was much more than his reading. He was wont to say that if he had read as much as other men he should have known no more than other men."

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Asa Don Brown

"Many men owe the grandeur of their lives to their tremendous difficulties."

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Asa Don Brown

"The violence in the world comes about because we human beings are forever creating barriers between men who are like us and men who are not like us."

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Fred Allen
"Washington is no place for a good actor. The competition from bad actors is too great."
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Fred Allen
"I can't understand why a person will take a year to write a novel when he can easily buy one for a few dollars."
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Fred Allen
"Most of us spend the first six days of each week sowing wild oats; then we go to church on Sunday and pray for a crop failure."
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Fred Allen
"The advertising world had space men in it before spacemen existed."
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Fred Allen
"It is probably not love that makes the world go around, but rather those mutually supportive alliances through which partners recognize their dependence on each other for the achievement of shared and private goals."
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Fred Allen
"A conference is a gathering of people who singly can do nothing, but together can decide that nothing can be done."
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Fred Allen
"Television is the triumph of machine over people."
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Fred Allen
"Some movie stars wear their sunglasses even in church. They're afraid God might recognize them and ask for autographs."
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Fred Allen
"An associate producer is the only guy in Hollywood who will associate with a producer."
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Fred Allen
"I learned law so well, the day I graduated I sued the college, won the case, and got my tuition back."
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