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"And yet all loneliness, angers, hatreds, envies, and itchings that (Hell) contains, if rolled into one single experience and put into the scale against the least moment of the joy that is felt by the least in Heaven, would have no weight that could be registered at all. Bad cannot succeed even in being bad as truly as good is good."

"Light travels half away around the world while darkness is still putting its shoes on."

"The weaknesses of the wise are better than the strengths of fools."

"The power of fiction is a great thing. But, after all, reality is just a little more important."
Explore more quotes by Eoin Colfer

"The humans were protecting their heritage, or so they thought. Strange that Mud Men seem more concerned about the past than the present."

"Excuse me, Tex,' the nurse said, hands on hips. 'Would you mind reining in the voice. There are babies being born in this hospital. We wouldn't want the first sound they hear to be your painful howling. There could be lawsuits."

"What's this?' he inquired, none too pleasantly. 'A circus?'No, Julius. It's the end of the circus.'I see. And these are the clowns?'Foaly's head poked through the doorway.'Pardon me for interrupting your extended circus metaphor, but what the hell is that?"

"Orion nodded, then asked, 'Dwarf cheese?'Cheese made by dwarfs.'Oh, said Orion, relieved. 'They make it. It's not actually . . .'No. What a horrible thought.'Exactly."

"No, mademoiselle, I would not like to see the children's menu. I have no doubt that the children's menu itself tastes better than the meals on it. I would like to order A la carte. Or don't you serve fish to minors?"

"Excuse me, Captain. Are you two going to weep salty tears of admiration over a helmet all night, or do we have matters to discuss?"

"A monkey glances up and sees a banana, and that's as far as he looks. A visionary looks up and sees the moon."

"Well, I don't like the first bit and I don't know the last bit. So I'm really hoping the middle bit is exceptional."
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