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"Even Tom Sawyer had a girlfriend and to talk about adults without talking about their sex drives is like talking about a window without glass."
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"It's fine to have anal sex as long as you're not in high school."

"For lack of a better term, they've labeled me a sex symbol. It's flattering and it should happen to every bald, overweight guy."

"Okay we both know... what happens... with sex... different places... different time... different date... different rooms... the biatch is still bitchy.... very bitchy as pitchy.... The agony - DOOOOOO YOU FEEL IT?- wE JUST PREDICTED THE FUTURE!"

"I wouldn't recommend sex, drugs or insanity for everyone, but they've always worked for me."
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