top of page
Quote_1.png
Joss Whedon

"Tonight sucks. And look at me. Look at - look at stupid Buffy. Too dumb for college, and-and-and freak Buffy, too strong for construction work. And-and my job at the magic shop? I was bored to tears even before the hour that wouldn't end. And the only person that I can even stand to be around is a... neutered vampire who cheats at kitten poker."

Standard 
 Customized
"Tonight sucks. And look at me. Look at - look at stupid Buffy. Too dumb for college, and-and-and freak Buffy, too strong for construction work. And-and my job at the magic shop? I was bored to tears even before the hour that wouldn't end. And the only person that I can even stand to be around is a... neutered vampire who cheats at kitten poker."

Exlpore more Humor quotes

Quote_1.png
Amber Hurdle

"Your party kicked so much ass!Even though you suck so much! It's like, instead of blood, your heart pumps liquid suck! But thanks for the beer!"

Quote_1.png
Amber Hurdle

"The real satire starts when I'm shockingly mocked,not mockingly shocked."

Quote_1.png
Amber Hurdle

"He has got no good red blood in his body," said Sir James."No. Somebody put a drop under a magnifying glass, and it was all semicolons and parentheses," said Mrs. Cadwallader."

Quote_1.png
Amber Hurdle

"CHARTERIS [unfolding his arms in terror] No, please. Dont. As a philosopher, it's my business to tell other people the truth; but it's not their business to tell it to me. I dont like it: it hurts."

Quote_1.png
Amber Hurdle

"How was I supposed to know 'lucked out' means 'I got screwed over' in Australian?"

Quote_1.png
Amber Hurdle

"I believe the phrase you're looking for is 'too much money and not enough things to spend it on."

Quote_1.png
Amber Hurdle

"Where did you find that one?''I have no idea. I'm a magnet for crazies, I guess.''They must be able to sense a kindred spirit.''Your one to talk. Don't you have more hordes of the undead to lead in a glorious revolution?''Zombies not undead. There's a fine distinction. And no. Right now I'm scouting new talent. The glorious revolution comes tomorrow."

Quote_1.png
Amber Hurdle

"I realized women and humor were linked very closely."

Quote_1.png
Amber Hurdle

"A good joke doesn't necessarily need appreciation from others. One can freely laugh at one's own deserving jokes."

Quote_1.png
Amber Hurdle

"He who joyfully marches to music in rank and file has already earned my contempt. He has been given a large brain by mistake, since for him the spinal cord would suffice."

Explore more quotes by Joss Whedon

Quote_1.png
Joss Whedon
"Passion. It lies in all of us. Sleeping... waiting... and though unwanted, unbidden, it will stir... open its jaws and howl. It speaks to us... guides us. Passion rules us all. And we obey. What other choice do we have? Passion is the source of our finest moments. The joy of love... the clarity of hatred... the ecstasy of grief. It hurts sometimes more than we can bear. If we could live without passion, maybe we'd know some kind of peace. But we would be hollow. Empty rooms, shuttered and dank. Without passion, we'd be truly dead."
Quote_1.png
Joss Whedon
"Recognizing power in another does not diminish your own."
Quote_1.png
Joss Whedon
"Everything we do really is just a little marker on the long road to death. And sometimes that's overwhelmingly depressing to me, and sometimes it makes me feel kinship and forgiveness. We've all got the same ending to the story. The way we make that story more elaborate, I got to respect."
Quote_1.png
Joss Whedon
"Remember to always be yourself. Unless you suck."
Quote_1.png
Joss Whedon
"I don't want the giant ego. I don't want to become Kevin Costner, singing on the soundtrack to The Postman."
Quote_1.png
Joss Whedon
"River Tam (Summer Glau): No power in the 'verse can stop me."
Quote_1.png
Joss Whedon
"When I was a kid, maybe 11, I remember saying, 'When I grow up I wanna have enough money to buy a really cool car, because I won't.'"
Quote_1.png
Joss Whedon
"Anything can be good. Even Last Action Hero could've been good. There's an idea somewhere in almost any movie : if you can find something that you love, then you can do it. If you can't, it doesn't matter how skilful you are..."
Quote_1.png
Joss Whedon
"Wherever I was, I was happy. At peace. I knew that everyone I cared about was all right. I knew it. Time didn't mean anything, nothing had form but I was still me, you know? And I was warm and I was loved and I was finished. Complete. I don't understand about theology or dimensions, or any of it, really but I think I was in heaven. And now I'm not. I was torn out of there. Pulled out by my friends. Everything here is hard, and bright, and violent. Everything I feel, everything I touch this is hell. Just getting through the next moment, and the one after that knowing what I've lost..."
Quote_1.png
Joss Whedon
"There's a lot of anger in the Twitter-verse, as I've discovered. But there's a lot of love."
bottom of page