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"The federal government has sponsored research that has produced a tomato that is perfect in every respect, except that you can't eat it. We should make every effort to make sure this disease, often referred to as 'progress', doesn't spread."
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"Democracy means government by the uneducated, while aristocracy means government by the badly educated."
"Who is an elected government in a constitutional democracy to decide it will not tolerate dissent."
"There are no doubts that western governments are willfully inducing radiation sickness into segments of their city populations."
"We all know what Parliament is, and we are all ashamed of it."
"If you make any money, the government shoves you in the creek once a year with it in your pockets, and all that don't get wet you can keep."
"Every decent man is ashamed of the government he lives under."
"Giving every man a vote has no more made men wise and free than Christianity has made them good."
"I can make a firm pledge, under my plan, no family making less than $250,000 a year will see any form of tax increase. Not your income tax, not your payroll tax, not your capital gains taxes, not any of your taxes."
"This country, with its institutions, belongs to the people who inhabit it. Whenever they shall grow weary of the existing government, they can exercise their constitutional right of amending it, or exercise their revolutionary right to overthrow it."
"The worst government is often the most moral. One composed of cynics is often very tolerant and humane. But when fanatics are on top there is no limit to oppression."
Explore more quotes by Andy Rooney
"The Super Bowl isn't for kids, I had a great time though and it was worth every nickel of it because by doing this lame piece about the game I can put it on my expense account."
"I just wish we knew a little less about his urethra and a little more about his arms sales to Iran."
"Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don't need to be done."
"Making duplicate copies and computer printouts of things no one wanted even one of in the first place is giving America a new sense of purpose."
"When those waiters ask me if I want some fresh ground pepper, I ask if they have any aged pepper."
"The only people who say worse things about politicians that reporters do are other politicians."
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