"That's the great thing about entering a convent: There are things that you simply can't do, so you don't have to worry about them."

Humor, Worry

43

Create Your Own Wallpaper

Standard

Customized

"That's the great thing about entering a convent: There are things that you simply can't do, so you don't have to worry about them."

Exlpore more Humor quotes

"Rogerson," I asked him sweetly as we sat watching a video in the pool house, "where would I find the pelagic zone?""In the open sea," he said. "Now shut up and eat your Junior Mints."

Sarah Dessen, American Author

Humor, Knowledge, Curiosity, Learning

"Playing Solitaire is a non-smoking employee's smoke break."

Mokokoma Mokhonoana, South African Philosopher

Humor, Truth, Wisdom, Life, Regret

"If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee."

Abraham Lincoln, American Politician

Humor, Coffee, Tea, President

"A sense of humor keen enough to show a man his own absurdities will keep him from the commission of all sins, or nearly all, save those worth committing."

Samuel Butler, British Poet

Humor, Man, Sense, Will

"Christ and The Church: If he were to apply for a divorce on the grounds of cruelty, adultery and desertion, he would probably get one."

Samuel Butler, British Poet

Humor, Adultery, Christ, Cruelty, Divorce

"England has forty-two religions and only two sauces."

Voltaire, French Writer

Humor, Religion, Diversity, Culture

"God is a comedian playing to an audience that is too afraid to laugh."

Voltaire, French Writer

Humor, God, Comedy, Fear, Laughter

"And then Mum spoons the coffee a little as if she's having fantasies of flinging it in Britt-Marie's face. But in a controlled way."

Fredrik Backman, Swedish Author

Humor, Family, Coffee, Emotion

"Stupidity is brief and guileless, while wit equivocates and hides. Wit is a scoundrel, while stupidity is honest and sincere."

Fyodor Dostoevsky, Russian Novelist

Humor, Stupidity, Wit, Honesty, Deception

"I say let the world go to hell, but I should always have my tea."

Fyodor Dostoevsky, Russian Novelist

Humor, Comfort, Tea, Indifference, Life

Explore more quotes by Lars von Trier

"When I was younger, I was fascinated by David Bowie, for example. he had created an entire myth around himself. It was as important as his music."

Music

"Actors need bricks to play with, and in fact we rejected all the improvised fragments we had made without a plan. Improvisation without a plan is like tennis without tennis balls."

Actor

"Far be it from me to force anyone into either chess or dressage, but if you choose to do so yourself, in my opinion there is only one way: follow the rules."

Humor

"I think it's important that we all try to give something to this medium, instead of just thinking about what is the most efficient way of telling a story or making an audience stay in a cinema."

Cinema

"More than anything, there are more images in evil. Evil is based far more on the visual, whereas good has no good images at all."

Evil

"When I was in film school, it was said that all good films were characterised by some form of humour."

Film

"It's always been a lie that it's difficult to make films."

Lie

"You could say that when you introduce humour to your work, you also step back a little from it. You create a distance."

Work

"I sit there pouring out my woes year after year, coming up with one enormity after another about my mother and the way she let me down; but it doesn't make me any the less fearful."

Family

"I'm having a vacation, and it's so beautiful, and maybe I'll never get another film idea in my life."

Life