"Apparently, one in five people in the world are Chinese. And there are five people in my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mum or my dad. Or my older brother, Colin. Or my younger brother, Ho-Chan-Chu. But I think it's Colin."

Father, Dad, Family, Brother, People

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"Apparently, one in five people in the world are Chinese. And there are five people in my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mum or my dad. Or my older brother, Colin. Or my younger brother, Ho-Chan-Chu. But I think it's Colin."

Explore more quotes by Tim Vine

"Apparently, one in five people in the world are Chinese. And there are five people in my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mum or my dad. Or my older brother, Colin. Or my younger brother, Ho-Chan-Chu. But I think it's Colin."

Father, Dad, Family, Brother, People

"You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.' So that was nice."

Driving, Today

"I love acting, but it's all just a bonus."

Love, Acting

"I was at sea the other day and loads of meat floated past. It was a bit choppy."

Day, Past, Sea

"So I rang up a local building firm, I said 'I want a skip outside my house.' He said 'I'm not stopping you.'"

Building, Want

"So I got home, and the phone was ringing. I picked it up, and said 'Who's speaking please?' And a voice said 'You are.'"

Home, Voice

"I've just been on a once-in-a-lifetime holiday. I'll tell you what, never again."

Holiday,

"Now, most dentist's chairs go up and down, don't they? The one I was in went back and forwards. I thought 'This is unusual'. And the dentist said to me 'Mr Vine, get out of the filing cabinet."

Thought, Now

"So I was getting into my car, and this bloke says to me "Can you give me a lift?" I said "Sure, you look great, the world's your oyster, go for it.'""

Car, World

"People ask 'do you make a conscious effort not to swear?' - if you're doing silly stuff you're not tempted to put swearing in. All the comics from my childhood, who were funny without swearing, were the people that influenced me. What I do is quite traditional anyway."

Funny, People, Childhood, Effort

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"We looked up to our father. He still is much greater than us."

Wynton Marsalis, American Musician

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"A dramatic thing, the first time you stand up to your dad."

Lenny Kravitz, American Musician

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"It was something she didn't want me to do because she thought the rejection would ruin my self-esteem. My father was, like, 'If she wants to try it, let her try it.'"

Ellen Muth, American Actress

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"Johnny Mercer was my father's best friend and became mine as well. And Harold Arlen, whom I would call Uncle Harry, and Harry Warren: those were ones who I really became close to."

Margaret Whiting, American Musician

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"My mom and dad are both in stand-up comedy, so that's where I started, that's where I got everything. My roots are holding the mic."

Pauly Shore, American Comedian

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"Laura Bush went on national television during the week of my father's funeral and spoke out against embryonic stem cell research, pointing out that where Alzheimer's is concerned, we don't have proof that stem-cell treatment would be effective."

Patti Davis, American Celebrity

Father, Proof, Research, Television

"I worked with my son when he was much younger; we did L.A. Law together, where I played his father and he played a kid who was suing his father for alienation of affection or something. It was great."

Rene Auberjonois, American Actor

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"My father was my teacher. But most importantly he was a great dad."

Beau Bridges, American Actor

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"My sister and I said, Dad, are you doing to do anything about that? And he mentioned treatments other people sent him that he'd been working on. So we thought it would be kind of cool to give these guys a real script."

Rae Dawn Chong, American Actress

Father, Dad, Sister, Thought, People

"President Bush is supporting Arnold but a lot of Republicans are not, because he is actually quite liberal. Karl Rove said if his father wasn't a Nazi, he wouldn't have any credibility with conservatives at all."

Bill Maher, American Comedian

Father, Credibility, Liberal, President