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"They say such nice things about people at their funerals that it makes me sad that I'm going to miss mine by just a few days."
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"People used what they called a telephone because they hated being close together and they were scared of being alone."
"Still and all, why bother? Here's my answer. Many people need desperately to receive this message: I feel and think much as you do, care about many of the things you care about, although most people do not care about them. You are not alone."
"People who see beauty all around them live in a beautiful world. People who see danger all around them live in a dangerous world."
"Now I don't know half of the young people in the industry. It's too spread out, too diffuse."
Explore more quotes by Garrison Keillor
"A minister has to be able to read a clock. At noon, it's time to go home and turn up the pot roast and get the peas out of the freezer."
"God writes a lot of comedy... the trouble is, he's stuck with so many bad actors who don't know how to play funny."
"Nothing you do for children is ever wasted. They seem not to notice us, hovering, averting our eyes, and they seldom offer thanks, but what we do for them is never wasted."
"The highlight of my childhood was making my brother laugh so hard that food came out of his nose."
"A girl in a bikini is like having a loaded pistol on your coffee table - There's nothing wrong with them, but it's hard to stop thinking about it."
"A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together."
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