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"All women become like their mothers. That is their tragedy. No man does. That's his."
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Personal Development

"The faces of most American women over thirty are relief maps of petulant and bewildered unhappiness."
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Personal Development

"Whether they give or refuse, it delights women just the same to have been asked."
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Personal Development

"You can find women who have never had an affair, but it is hard to find a woman who has had just one."
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Personal Development

"The Cause of Women is generally the Cause of Virtue."
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Personal Development

"What, sir, would the people of the earth be without woman? They would be scarce, sir, almighty scarce."
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Personal Development

"Aristotle maintained that women have fewer teeth than men; although he was twice married, it never occurred to him to verify this statement by examining his wives' mouths."
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Personal Development

"I was never very interested in boys - and there were plenty of them - vying with one another to see how many famous women they would get into the hay."
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Personal Development

"Every woman is just a different kind of problem."
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Personal Development

"The three great problems of this century; the degradation of man in the proletariat, the subjection of women through hunger, the atrophy of the child by darkness."
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Personal Development
More

"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it."
Humor

"When a person cannot deceive himself the chances are against his being able to deceive other people."
Truth

"Always do what is right. It will gratify half of mankind and astound the other."
Morality

"The preacher who casts a vote for conscience' sake, runs the risk of starving."
Politics

"The main difference between a cat and a lie is that a cat only has nine lives."
Humor

"When red-haired people are above a certain social grade their hair is auburn."
Identity

"Thanksgiving Day, a function which originated in New England two or three centuries ago when those people recognized that they really had something to be thankful for -- annually, not oftener -- if they had succeeded in exterminating their neighbors, the Indians, during the previous twelve months instead of getting exterminated by their neighbors, the Indians. Thanksgiving Day became a habit, for the reason that in the course of time, as the years drifted on, it was perceived that the exterminating had ceased to be mutual and was all on the white man's side, consequently on the Lord's side; hence it was proper to thank the Lord for it and extend the usual annual compliments."
History

"Yes, King Edward VI lived only a few years, poor boy, but he lived them worthily."
History

"Good friends good books and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life."
Happiness

"There are basically two types of people. People who accomplish things, and people who claim to have accomplished things. The first group is less crowded."
Wisdom
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