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"I've begun worshipping the sun for a number of reasons. First of all, unlike some other gods I could mention, I can see the sun. It's there for me every day. And the things it brings me are quite apparent all the time: heat, light, food, and a lovely day. There's no mystery, no one asks for money, I don't have to dress up, and there's no boring pageantry. And interestingly enough, I have found that the prayers I offer to the sun and the prayers I formerly offered to 'God' are all answered at about the same 50% rate."
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"Enlightenment is always there. Small enlightenment will bring great enlightenment. If you breathe in and are aware that you are alive - that you can touch the miracle of being alive - then that is a kind of enlightenment."

"We can block our blessings with one thought, one decision. Sometimes your blessing may require certain actions on your behalf. You asked for the job? Now, you must get dressed and go to the interview and prove yourself worthy of the position. When you move, you activate your faith. And, suddenly everything falls into place. Faith without works is dead."

"Many are concerned with going to heaven or hell, But fail to realize that you can be living in heaven or hell right here on Earth."

"It's funny how, in this journey of life, even though we may begin at different times and places, our paths cross with others so that we may share our love, compassion, observations, and hope. This is a design of God that I appreciate and cherish."

"The time has come to harness the blessed power within us and to use it to transcend from our current existence into a more empowered reality."

"Jesus said "Give us THIS DAY our daily bread", knowing that you cannot fight today's battles with yesterday's bread. Knowing that you cannot fight today's battles with the hope of tomorrow's bread. Knowing that today you will be nourished by this daily bread, and it's what you have to fight today's battle."
Explore more quotes by George Carlin

"He - and if there is a God, I am convinced he is a he, because no woman could or would ever fuck things up this badly."

"As it stands right now, I lead Richard Pryor in heart attacks, two to one. However, Richard still leads me, one to nothing, in burning yourself up."

"I'm not concerned about all hell breaking loose, but that a PART of hell will break loose... it'll be much harder to detect."

"At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom."

"The very existence of flame-throwers proves that some time, somewhere, someone said to themselves, You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I'm just not close enough to get the job done."

"I think people should be allowed to do anything they want. We haven't tried that for a while. Maybe this time it'll work."

"Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck."

"Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit."
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