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Wilson Mizner

"A slave has but one master. An ambition man, has as many as there are people who helped him get his fortune."

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"A slave has but one master. An ambition man, has as many as there are people who helped him get his fortune."

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Donna Grant

"Often people display a curious respect for a man drunk, rather like the respect of simple races for the insane... There is something awe-inspiring in one who has lost all inhibitions."

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"The last resort of kings, the cannonball. The last resort of the people, the paving stone."

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"It is not true that people are naturally equal for no two people can be together for even a half an hour without one acquiring an evident superiority over the other."

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"There are bad people who would be less dangerous if they were quite devoid of goodness."

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"I do not want people to be very agreeable, as it saves me the trouble of liking them a great deal."

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Donna Grant

"There are only two kinds of people who are really fascinating - people who know absolutely everything, and people who know absolutely nothing."

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Donna Grant

"We confess our little faults to persuade people that we have no large ones."

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Donna Grant

"Some people break promises for the pleasure of breaking them."

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Donna Grant

"I do give books as gifts sometimes, when people would rather have one than a new Ferrari."

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Donna Grant

"If something in your writing gives support to people in their lives, that's more than just entertainment-which is what we writers all struggle to do, to touch people."

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Wilson Mizner
"Do not be desirous of having things done quickly. Do not look at small advantages. Desire to have things done quickly prevents their being done thoroughly. Looking at small advantages prevents great affairs from being accomplished."
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Wilson Mizner
"A fellow who is always declaring he's no fool usually has his suspicions."
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Wilson Mizner
"A good listener is not only popular everywhere, but after a while, he knows something."
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Wilson Mizner
"Hollywood is a sewer with service from the Ritz Carlton."
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Wilson Mizner
"To profit from good advice requires more wisdom than to give it."
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Wilson Mizner
"Life's a tough proposition, and the first hundred years are the hardest."
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Wilson Mizner
"Those who welcome death have only tried it from the ears up."
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Wilson Mizner
"The most efficient water power in the world - women's tears."
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Wilson Mizner
"I know of no sentence that can induce such immediate and brazen lying as the one that begins, 'Have you read - .'"
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Wilson Mizner
"I've spent several years in Hollywood, and I still think the movie heroes are in the audience."
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