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"What no wife of a writer can ever understand is that a writer is working when he's staring out of the window."
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"Never be unfaithful to a lover, except with your wife."
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"I'm not a real movie star. I've still got the same wife I started out with twenty-eight years ago."
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"If you would have a good wife, marry one who has been a good daughter."
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"He knows little, who will tell his wife all he knows."
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"Now I need to take a piece of wood and make it sound like the railroad track, but I also had to make it beautiful and lovable so that a person playing it would think of it in terms of his mistress, a bartender, his wife, a good psychiatrist - whatever."
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"I think it all comes down to relationships - how I treat my wife, how I treat my kids, how I treat the guys at the grocery store, all aspects of every day, what I'm involved in."
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"Let us now set forth one of the fundamental truths about marriage: the wife is in charge."
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"But when we have families, when we have children, this gives us a purpose for being, to protect our children, to avoid going to jail because if I'm in jail, who looks after my children, who's there for my wife?"
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"My wife thinks I'm completely mad."
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"We can't thank Dave enough. He could call me if my wife was about to have a baby and tell me he needed tonight for his show and I'd find some way to get her to let me head to New York."
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"What no wife of a writer can ever understand is that a writer is working when he's staring out of the window."
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