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W. C. Fields

"Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people."

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"Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people."

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Amber Hurdle

"They're talking about banning cigarette smoking now in any place that's used by ten or more people in a week, which, I guess, means that Madonna can't even smoke in bed."

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Amber Hurdle

"Let's make a law that gay people can have birthdays, but straight people get more cake - you know, to send the right message to kids."

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Amber Hurdle

"The tea baggers. The one thing they hate is when you call them racist. The other thing they hate is black people. But they won't say it."

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Amber Hurdle

"I hope that people will finally come to realize that there is only one 'race' - the human race - and that we are all members of it."

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Amber Hurdle

"I'm not sure whay I've been drawn to this subject, except that murder is a subject that has always drawn people for as long as people have been telling stories."

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Amber Hurdle

"If you ask a hundred people, they all give you different answers."

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Amber Hurdle

"You can be around 100 people and be completely alone. People don't realize what it's really like."

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Amber Hurdle

"In our leisure we reveal what kind of people we are."

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Amber Hurdle

"With most people disbelief in a thing is founded on a blind belief in some other thing."

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Amber Hurdle

"Too late, the ordinary German realized that the violence which before had been directed against 'other' people could now equally land on him."

Explore more quotes by W. C. Fields

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W. C. Fields
"Here lies W. C. Fields. I would rather be living in Philadelphia."
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W. C. Fields
"It was a woman who drove me to drink, and I never had the courtesy to thank her for it."
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W. C. Fields
"If I had to live my life over, I'd live over a saloon."
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W. C. Fields
"The best cure for insomnia is to get a lot of sleep."
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W. C. Fields
"The world is getting to be such a dangerous place, a man is lucky to get out of it alive."
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W. C. Fields
"Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days we had to live on nothing but food and water."
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W. C. Fields
"The laziest man I ever met put popcorn in his pancakes so they would turn over by themselves."
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W. C. Fields
"Remember, a dead fish can float downstream, but it takes a live one to swim upstream."
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W. C. Fields
"Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water."
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W. C. Fields
"Never try to impress a woman, because if you do she'll expect you to keep up the standard for the rest of your life."
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