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"I was having trouble making ends meet, and my beginnings weren't meeting either."
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"Obsolescence never meant the end of anything, it's just the beginning."

"There is a difference between a book of two hundred pages from the very beginning, and a book of two hundred pages which is the result of an original eight hundred pages. The six hundred are there. Only you don't see them."
Explore more quotes by Allan Sherman

"It's a play where something went wrong, 'Cause it's five hours, twelve minutes long. If you sit there, my friend, From beginning 'til end, Then your bladder better be strong!"

"In Hollywood if you are not working, you are a leper. True, you are probably living in the most expensive leper colony in the world."

"I had moved out of the Edison Hotel because I couldn't pay the bill and was living at the Lincoln Hotel, where I couldn't pay the bill either, but it was cheaper."

"Somewhere, over the rainbow, Way up tall, There's a land where they've never heard of cholesterol."

"You want to fall in love with a shoe, go ahead. A shoe can't love you back, but, on the other hand, a shoe can't hurt you too deeply either. And there are so many nice-looking shoes."

"Grandma cheated whenever she could. She cheated because it was a much more scientific and surer way of winning than trusting to luck."

"Adultery - which is the only grounds for divorce in New York - is not grounds for divorce in California. As a matter of fact, adultery in Southern California is grounds for marriage."

"They sit there in committees day after day, And they each put in a color and it comes out gray. And we all have heard the saying, which is true as well as witty, That a camel is a horse that was designed by a committee."

"Success is like winning the sweepstakes or getting killed in an automobile crash. It always happens to somebody else."
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