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"If I hear the word 'perky' again, I'll puke."
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"His saliva tasted like the wet dicks of ten thousand lonely truck drivers."

"This is the most I have ever been in the sewers in one place. If someone had said to me a month ago, 'Hey, Jackal, guess where you'll be spending most of your time in New Covington? Ankle-deep in shit!' I would've ripped their lips off."

"The vampire gagged. The muscles of its neck constricted, widened, constricted again, and it disgorged a six-inch-long metal cylinder onto my desk. The bloodsucker grasped it, twisted the cylinder's halves apart, and retrieved a roll of papers. "Photographs, Ghastek said, handing me a couple of sheets from the roll."That's disgusting."He is thirty years old, Ghastek said. "All his internal organs, with the exception of the heart, atrophied long ago. The throat makes for a very good storage cavity. People seem to prefer it to the anus.Translation: be happy I didn't pull it out of my ass. Thank the gods for small favors."

"I mean, we've had all these awful pictures from the prison in Iraq and these sort of memos floating around about justifying torture, all this kind of stuff. And it makes you want to take a shower, you know?"
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"You know, you've got serious pieces, you've got light pieces, you've got cooking segments, you've got health-related topics, so it's not as if they've had a unique personality from the get-go."

"They see us interacting with people, they see us doing serious interviews, they see us having fun, and when you're conversing with someone, you get a much clearer impression of who that person is than if they are just reading into a news piece."

"I think sometimes people project things on you, but I'm trying to handle everything that's happened to me with a certain amount of grace, dignity and good manners. You just can't necessarily win all the time."

"That studies have shown that more people are getting up earlier, they're getting their news earlier. They're getting less sleep, getting up at earlier hours."

"At least for me personally, I've always tried to do a really good job every day, with each interview, and treat each interview seriously, and make the person I'm speaking with feel comfortable, hopefully make it an ideal experience."

"And they like being able to turn on the television day in and day out to see someone that they know and they feel comfortable with and trust hopefully and respect even."

"I know there's a great deal of speculation, and while I appreciate the interest, kind of, my contract ends in May and I'm trying to figure out what I'm going to do. I'm fortunate to have a couple of opportunities to think long and hard about."

"I could announce one morning that the world was going to blow up in three hours and people would be calling in about my hair!"
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