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"A real job is a job you hate."
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"Life sometimes confuses us by making us discover in someone we hate a quality or qualities we love."

"I never keep a scorecard or the batting averages. I hate statistics. What I got to know, I keep in my head."

"I never storyboard. I hate it. I don't understand why so many directors want to make comic strips of their films."

"If a university official's letter accusing a speaker of having a proclivity to commit speech crimes before she's given the speech - which then leads to Facebook postings demanding that Ann Coulter be hurt, a massive riot and a police-ordered cancellation of the speech - is not hate speech, then there is no such thing as hate speech."

"Hate does that. Burns off everything but itself, so whatever your grievance is, your face looks just like your enemy's."
Explore more quotes by Bill Watterson

"That's the whole problem with science. You've got a bunch of empiricists trying to describe things of unimaginable wonder."

"In my opinion, we don't devote nearly enough scientific research to finding a cure for jerks."

"You know, sometimes kids get bad grades in school because the class moves too slow for them. Einstein got D's in school. Well guess what, I get F's!!!"

"Sometimes when I'm talking, my words can't keep up with my thoughts. I wonder why we think faster than we speak. Probably so we can think twice."
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