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"My father would take me to the playground, and put me on mood swings."
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"To he who avenges a father, nothing is impossible."
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Personal Development
"I may neither choose who I would, nor refuse who I dislike; so is the will of a living daughter curbed by the will of a dead father."
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Personal Development
"I used to annoy my father by telling him how much I felt luck was with me."
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Personal Development
"Dad made it to Gold Shield Detective, so he always busted Robin, my oldest brother, and me. Always got caught, whatever we were doing."
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Personal Development
"My father, who had previously been a civil engineer, died in the great influenza epidemic of 1918."
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Personal Development
"What I do now is all my dad's fault, because he bought me a guitar as a boy, for no apparent reason."
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Personal Development
"I would ask my dad what he did, and he'd say, 'I listen to people's problems.' In some way what he did for a living is in my genes."
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Personal Development
"My dad? He died when I was 19, which is a bad time for your dad to die, because there's an awful lot of things you have to resolve with your parents past your teens if you've been a difficult teenager."
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Personal Development
"My dad and my uncles used to always be in the studio at my house."
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Personal Development
"My Dad died during the flu epidemic in 1918 when I was 4 years old. He left a lot of classical recordings behind that I began listening to at an early age, so he must have been a music lover."
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"My whole family is lactose intolerant and when we take pictures we can't say cheese."
Family
"My girlfriend has crabs, I bought her fishnet stockings."
Girlfriend
"I went to a urologist - he told me I could go at any time."
Time
"I wanted to join the Army the sign said 'Be All That You Can Be', they told me it wasn't enough."
Army
"I wanted to take up music, so my father bought me a blunt instrument. He told me to knock myself out."
Music
"I recorded my hair this morning, tonight I'm watching the highlights."
Hair
"I'm convinced my cockroaches have military training, I set off a roach bomb - they diffused it."
Military
"My father would take me to the playground, and put me on mood swings."
Father
"I went to the store and bought lady fingers, when I got home I noticed one of the fingers was missing so I went back to the store and the manager was nice enough to give me the finger."
Home
"I once dated a weather girl, we talked up a storm."
Weather
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