"The Democrats seem to be basically nicer people, but they have demonstrated time and again that they have the management skills of celery."

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"The Democrats seem to be basically nicer people, but they have demonstrated time and again that they have the management skills of celery."

Explore more quotes by Dave Barry

"Auto racing is boring except when a car is going at least 172 miles per hour upside down."

Car, Racing

"Big business never pays a nickel in taxes, according to Ralph Nader, who represents a big consumer organization that never pays a nickel in taxes."

Business, Taxes

"Bill Gates is a very rich man today... and do you want to know why? The answer is one word: versions."

Man, Today, Want

"Camping is nature's way of promoting the motel business."

Business, Nature, Camping

"Geographically, Ireland is a medium-sized rural island that is slowly but steadily being consumed by sheep."

Being, Ireland, Sheep

"Don't you wish you had a job like mine? All you have to do is think up a certain number of words! Plus, you can repeat words! And they don't even have to be true!"

Job,

"I am not the only person who uses his computer mainly for the purpose of diddling with his computer."

Purpose, Computer

"Newspaper readership is declining like crazy. In fact, there's a good chance that nobody is reading my column."

Chance, Fact, Reading

"Have you noticed that whatever sport you're trying to learn, some earnest person is always telling you to keep your knees bent?"

Society, Trying

"Hobbies of any kind are boring except to people who have the same hobby. This is also true of religion, although you will not find me saying so in print."

Religion, People, Hobbies, Saying

Exlpore more Time quotes

"As a teenager you are at the last stage in your life when you will be happy to hear that the phone is for you."

Fran Lebowitz, American Journalist

Time, Life, Will

"Now this is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning."

Winston Churchill, English Statesman

Time, Beginning, End, Now

"All great achievements require time."

Maya Angelou, American Poet

Time,

"Everyone has his day and some days last longer than others."

Winston Churchill, English Statesman

Time, Day

"Time is more value than money. You can get more money, but you cannot get more time."

Jim Rohn, American Businessman

Time, Money, Value

"There is no waste of time in life like that of making explanations."

Benjamin Disraeli, British Statesman

Time, Life, Explanations, Waste

"Clocks slay time... time is dead as long as it is being clicked off by little wheels; only when the clock stops does time come to life."

William Faulkner, American Novelist

Time, Life, Being, Clocks

"The years teach much which the days never know."

Ralph Waldo Emerson, American Poet

Time, Years

"Life was always a matter of waiting for the right moment to act."

Paulo Coelho, Brazilian Novelist

Time, Life, Act, Right, Waiting

"Life is divided into three terms - that which was, which is, and which will be. Let us learn from the past to profit by the present, and from the present to live better in the future."

William Wordsworth, English Poet

Time, Life, Future, Past, Present