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"Usually, jet lag is not this big of an issue for me. I'm not sure why I'm so disoriented this time. It could be due to the amount of chocolate and french fries I've eaten in the last two and a half weeks."
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"Time interval is a strange and contradictory matter in the mind. It would be reasonable to suppose that a routine time or an eventless time would seem interminable. It should be so, but it is not. It is the dull eventless times that have no duration whatever. A time splashed with interest, wounded with tragedy, crevassed with joy - that's the time that seems long in the memory. And this is right when you think about it. Eventlessness has no posts to drape duration on. From nothing to nothing is no time at all."

"Opinion is like a pendulum and obeys the same law. If it goes past the centre of gravity on one side, it must go a like distance on the other; and it is only after a certain time that it finds the true point at which it can remain at rest."

"I'm proud of being part Cherokee, and I think it's time all us Indians felt the same way."

"Time is like money, the less we have of it to spare the further we make it go."
Explore more quotes by April Winchell

"I'd like to run for office someday, but I'm afraid my ability to spell might give me an unfair advantage."

"I have found that many other countries will buy off on anything American. As much as they hate us, they want to be us more than anything."

"Orphans, dead parents, lonely children at Christmas, morose spoken word recordings, everything you love about the holidays. Move the turkey over so you can fit your head in the oven."

"Like every aspect of cancer I've weathered thus far, today's experience was not at all demoralizing, expensive or humiliating. No, it was just plain fun."

"I had a migraine for about seven or eight straight days, and I was unable to sleep most nights."

"The theme of the party was Neverland Ranch, so guests were asked to come as anyone or anything associated with Michael Jackson. It was all very disturbing."

"I can wholeheartedly apologize for not being at all sorry. And it really is the least I can do."
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