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"I like ice hockey, but it's a frustrating game to watch. It's hard to keep your eyes on both the puck and the players and too much time passes between scoring in hockey. There are usually more fights than there are points."
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"The time is always right, just act."
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"I call it like the domino theory of reality. If you can go one step at a time and it seems to make sense, you can then take your audience into an area that is relatively outlandish."
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Explore more quotes by Andy Rooney
"As an old reporter, we have a few secrets, and the first thing is we try the phone book."
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"Making duplicate copies and computer printouts of things no one wanted even one of in the first place is giving America a new sense of purpose."
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"Elephants and grandchildren never forget."
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"People will generally accept facts as truth only if the facts agree with what they already believe."
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"I like ice hockey, but it's a frustrating game to watch. It's hard to keep your eyes on both the puck and the players and too much time passes between scoring in hockey. There are usually more fights than there are points."
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"I hope all of you are going to fill out your census form when it comes in the mail next month. If you don't return the form the area you live in might get less government money and you wouldn't want that to happen, would you."
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"The federal government has sponsored research that has produced a tomato that is perfect in every respect, except that you can't eat it. We should make every effort to make sure this disease, often referred to as 'progress', doesn't spread."
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"The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong."
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"Computers may save time but they sure waste a lot of paper. About 98 percent of everything printed out by a computer is garbage that no one ever reads."
Computer
"Nothing in fine print is ever good news."
News
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