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"Fool me once, shame on youfool me twice, shame on mefool me thrice, I'm gonna get the frying pan!"
Author Name
Personal Development
"As a comedian, the more you commit the sin of stupidity, three essential things happen to your life:~people applaud you incessantly.~love you more than their parents.~give you a daily bread."
Author Name
Personal Development
"My religion consists of laughing at myself. My motto is this: As long as there is a me, there is a reason to laugh out loud!"
Author Name
Personal Development
"Well, that depends, I suppose. I heard someone once say that men dance the same way they have sex. So, if you want everyone here to think you're the kind of guy who just sits around and-" He stood up. "Let's dance."
Author Name
Personal Development
"The cleverest woman finds a need for foolish admirers."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Always be wary of any helpful item that weighs less than its operating manual."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I was my own boss, but that all changed the day I got married."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Could you hold the chainsaw a bit closer to your mouth, please?"
Author Name
Personal Development
"Unless you stop him. Perhaps next we meet.""You'll be just as annoying?" I guessed.He fixed my with those warm brown eyes. "Or perhaps you could bring me up to speed on those modern courtship rituals."I sat there stunned until he gave me a glimpse of a smile-just enough to let me know he was teasing. Then he disappeared."Oh, very funny!" I yelled."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Don't ask for a girl's hand in marriage and forget to ask for her leg too."
Author Name
Personal Development
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"When I start writing songs and it turns into an overly belabored intellectual process, I just throw it out."
Music
"I love songs that are very autobiographical."
Love
"It's when someone has an agenda of their own for the record that it doesn't work for me."
Work
"They're different kinds of challenges depending upon what phase of life I'm in."
Life
"I could write six songs in one day with everything that's going on."
Day
"I wish people could acheive what they think would bring them happiness in order for them to realize that thats not really what happiness is."
Happiness
"At one point, I was just perceived as only being angry, but now I'm being perceived as angry, peaceful, and spiritual."
Being
"Down the road, I'll probably have a kid or two or three. And there will probably be political events or spiritual things to comment on, and humor."
Humor
"I'm doing it because I choose it. And if it's not working, I can make a change."
Change
"What I try to keep in mind is that there are going to be a lot of articles that are going to be misrepresentative of what I'm about as a person and as a writer."
Mind
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